All slang terminology for getting an erection.
As a 40 year old woman, I’ve been around the block enough to have encountered both hard wood and soft wood.
My first experience with soft wood was at UCSB, my freshman year.
I was flirting heavily with Kyle, a resident in the men’s hallway flanking my women’s hallway in my dorm.
Kyle was a tall, handsome volleyball player from San Diego who was quite the flirt. Having never been particularly successful with women in high school, he was delighted to hit college (at upwards of 6+ feet tall) and discover a gathering of women who were all into him.
I think Kyle was well liked and well shared amongst the women in my hallway.
My friends and I were eating dinner in the cafeteria. We were discussing soft wood and I bragged that I’d never encountered soft wood in all my 18 years. Oops. Bad timing.
That night when Kyle and I fooled around, he couldn’t get it up.
He’d clearly had too much to drink and it was a case of whiskey dick, but he gave me my first taste of soft wood.
He made up for it later by waking me up to a very compromising activity.
Fast forward years ahead. I’m dating a member of a football team.
He admits he’s addicted to oral sex (who isn’t?) and I discover why.
The man can barely get it up. And certainly can’t get it hard enough to actually do the deed.
There really is not a lot worse than getting ready to have sex and discover that all the parts aren’t working.
I had an older boyfriend who was so afraid of this happening, he would take a preemptory little blue pill before lovemaking.
As women, our Turn ON is not visible on the outside and the consummation of our passions doesn’t always require that all our parts go through a pretty significant transition. If we want to do it, but we’re not fully in the mood, we can always fake it. Not that I’m encouraging that.
For men though, the parts need to work to consummate sexual activity, at least in the classic sense.
I have a lot of empathy for men who struggle to get everything working properly.
The nice thing is that there are plenty other things that can be done to enjoy each other, even when the equipment malfunctions – toys, mouths, hands, fingers, massages, etc.
Think extended foreplay until you…
Naturally, I’m impressed when I’m with a man who can go and keep going until I’m worn out. But my point is the other side of the spectrum isn’t so bad either, provided there’s no serious underlying health issue.
Getting it up is not the end all, be all to lovemaking.