Little known fact: I’m on Ritalin.
Not because I have ADD or ADHD but because one of the medications I’m on for a long term illness causes COGNITIVE SLOWING which makes it hard for me to think and respond in conversations.
And I’m very sensitive to it.
Once upon a time, I prided myself on always having something relevant and thoughtful to say.
Now I struggle to recall the word “dog.”
I’m not kidding.
I’ll never forget the time I was talking about raccoons but I couldn’t remember the word ‘raccoon’ so I had to describe them as “those animals that look like little bandits…”
You know, trash pandas.
The problem with medication these days is that those of us on long term medication to manage a disease wind up taking medications which treat the disease but cause a whole host of side effects.
In my case, those side effects are minimal. But for others, not so much.
I’m reminded of the song lyrics from Jefferson Airplane’s White Rabbit: One pill makes you larger, and one pill makes you small…
So as I sit here, swallowing a handful of pills to manage what ails me, I think about how very lucky I am to have Ritalin to take to help me out with my COGNITIVE SLOWING.
So if you’re talking to me, and you notice that I’m a little slow to respond or I listen a whole lot more than I speak, forgive my quietness.
It’s not for lack of interest.
This is why I love my friend Dante. He is super gregarious and whenever I’m in a conversation with him, and he always carries more than his load (a habit that carries through on the playa where he does more than his fair share of the workload).
It’s also why I love being around old friends – people who know me well enough to not mistake my silence for rudeness.
And it’s why I love to blog.
Because “on paper” I can take my time and compose my words, google the words I forget, and write something hopefully witty and bright.