Vices

michelleI’m thinking of giving up all of my vices all at once for 30 days.

  • No sex.
  • No alcohol.
  • No dates.
  • No men.
  • No skipping workouts.
  • No crappy food (hello KFC!)

I’ve had this desire to give up my vices before.

Every time I meet a guy I like who doesn’t like me back I have the urge to purge, you could say.

I imagine suddenly pulling myself together quite nicely – working out, eating healthy, skipping booze, ignoring men, guarding my sexuality, etc.

But somewhere between concept and execution, I get a little lost.

It NEVER fails to amaze me: as soon as I swear off men, buckets of awesome men come into my world and want to take me out.

How do I say no to that?

I’m afraid no sooner will I declare myself vice-free, then I’m going to be eating my words – having sex, dating, eating crap, skipping workouts, and of course drinking.

It does occur to me that THIS IS PERHAPS WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME.

Why my karma seems off and in need of a little tweaking.

Why instead of unblundering, I am blundering away.

Yes, perhaps I just need to adjust some settings in my lifestyle and I will be a suitable companion for another decent human being.

So why is it so FREAKING HARD to accomplish?

Then again, it could have absolutely nothing to do with me and everything to do with simple logistics.

I haven’t met the right man.

Surely I shouldn’t have to pretend or work really hard at being something I am not?

Maybe I’m perfect exactly as I am and when the right guy comes around, he’s going to pull up a pull up a chair, plop down a bucket of KFC and say to me, “Where the hell have you been babe? Let’s skip the gym, go get a drink and then fuck like rabbits!”

Maybe. . .

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