Hair pie

About two years ago, I started the process of having all my pubic hair removed via laser light treatment.

There’s a few things they don’t make expressly clear when you sign up for these treatments.

  1. You may have to have upwards of a dozen treatments to remove the hair.
  2. The treatments hurt like hell. Like a rubber band being snapped against your nethers. Ouch!
  3. The laser treatment is good at removing dark hair against light skin. If you are a blond, like me, you may not be able to get rid of all the hair. The hair is too blond.
  4. If you can’t get rid of all the hair, you will still be left shaving or waxing regularly to remove the remainder of your pubic hair. Sux!

Yes folks, that means I spent upwards of $1,000 to get my snatch as smooth as a baby’s bottom and yet I STILL HAVE TO SHAVE.

I find it rather embarrassing to have a smattering of hair where a full pie used to be. It’s like a tease to the men who encounter it – hello, here’s a smooth pussy… just kidding!

And let’s face it, that’s the WHOLE REASON WHY WE REMOVE OUR HAIR IN THE FIRST PLACE – to make it soft and smooth and totally pleasure-based. There’s no functionality or purpose to having no hair. Actually, hair serves a function and purpose down there – dispersing moisture and pheromones, signaling sexual maturity, and protecting from friction and bacteria.

My only option at this point, is to keep going for laser treatments, and HOPE that they eventually get all those baby blond hairs you can’t see but you can feel.

It figures this would happen to me. The only comparison I can give you is that it’s like committing yourself to a tattoo and then discovering that you can’t finish the tattoo halfway through.

There’s no doubt about it… you’re screwed.

4 thoughts on “Hair pie

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