F*cking Dance!!!

michelleI am not a good dancer.

This I know.

I tend to do the side step and I rarely move my arms.

I’m quite boring, really.

HOWEVER, put a few drinks in me and I turn into a freak on the dance floor.

I’m one of THOSE people.

The kind of person who can only dance when I have a few drinks in me.

Well, there I am at Decompression SF, dancing (sober) and not making a good spectacle of myself when I am approached by this beautiful lady wearing a blue wig, a tiny skirt, and a really tight corset.

“We’re all gonna die so you might as well dance,” she says to me.

Ok.

I thought that was what I was doing.

She then proceeds to cajole/berate me into dancing the way SHE wants me to dance.

She grabs my arms and moves them.

She removes my backpack and sets it down on a nearby table.

She takes off my leather jacket and puts it with my backpack.

She grabs Todd, Marina’s boyfriend, and tells him to tell my boyfriend how HOT I am.

Jesus.

“You have to commit,” she tells me. “If you half ass it you look like a fool.”

My dance lesson turned into boot camp.

Finally, the song ended and I tried to get away.

I grabbed my stuff.

“No. Dance. One more,” the lady in blue said.

I extricated myself from her grip.

No.

I want to GO.

Marina, perhaps seeing my distress, came over and pulled me away.

I rolled my eyes HARD.

Jesus.

Just leave me alone to dance the way I want.

I actually DO enjoy dancing.

And just to prove it for my birthday I’m going dancing in downtown Campbell with my friends.

To celebrate and dance my ass off.

Without the Blue Dance Nazi telling me what to do.

2 thoughts on “F*cking Dance!!!

  1. Pingback: It’s not a birthday party unless someone brings a bag of dicks. . . | unblunder

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s