I am a planner.
All my shit is packed for Burning Man already.
Just add food.
And I plan events IRL.
It’s just what I do.
So when I found out that The Swede was coming to California to go to unSCruz with me, you can be damn sure that I planned the hell out of that weekend.
I wanted it perfect.
Now as many of you know, I have a “thing” for lingerie.
Every time I sleep with someone new, I get new lingerie.
It’s just a habit I’ve developed over time.
New man = new lingerie.
That accounts for why I have 5 (used to be 7) drawers full of the stuff.
So I bought lingerie for The Swede.
A short little black, strappy number in soft silk.
And then, as is typical for me, I proceeded to get too drunk to figure out how to put it on.
It’s not easy to navigate strappy things in the dark when you’re drunk and a handsome warm man is laying in your bed waiting for you.
So I went to bed naked.
Which is par for the course for me.
Girl attempts to seduce boys with sexy lingerie. Girl gets too drunk to put on sexy lingerie. Girl continues to buy sexy lingerie even though it never gets worn.
Story of my life.