Birth Control

I am not a big fan of birth control.

Ever since I got a depo shot and proceeded to cry for the next three months, I’m loathe to alter my hormones.

It was such a horrific experience, it traumatized not only me but my ex-husband who agreed to use condoms for birth control for the rest of our marriage (10 years).

Perhaps this is why he got me pregnant five times. . .

I may not be a fan of birth control, but I’m even less of a fan of unwanted pregnancies, so needless to say I usually have some form of birth control on me.

The nice thing about going through a real hormonal cycle is getting to enjoy your hormones when you ovulate.

It’s seriously the one reason why my ex-husband didn’t complain about using condoms.

For one week out of the month, I was literally GAGGING for it.

He worked the swing shift and I would call him up and beg him to come home and “take care of business.”

I couldn’t get enough.

Now that I’m single, it’s s double-edged sword.

On the one hand, I get to enjoy the ride.

On the other hand, there’s no one coming home to me to “take care of business.”

I also have to be careful because I date men of a certain age who don’t like to wear condoms.

I politely explain that I’m not on birth control and how do they feel about an 18-year financial commitment?

It forces them to slip one on.

The irony is that I HATE condoms.

But since I hate condoms less than I hate unwanted pregnancy, I a compelled to use them.

And voila!

No babies. No STIs.

Two birds. One stone.

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