Judgy McJudgerson

I don’t talk much about my 2015 burn mainly because it was a painful experience for me.

I was ditched by a friend.

Then I got dumped.

I happened to tell the story to some new friends on the playa and during the conversation it came out that despite the breakup, I still continued sleeping with the guy who dumped me.

The men in the group were dumbfounded.

Why would I do that?

Do I have any self-respect?

Who shares her bed with someone who dumped her?

[Ah, well I think that happens a lot more frequently than we’d care to admit.]

I let their judgments wash over me.

I asked myself, why DID I do that?

Why didn’t I walk off and find new friends?

I think I gave a flippant answer to the men in the group. Something like “I don’t keep a platonic bed.”

Better to be seen as a nymphomaniac than a doormat, right?

But that really wasn’t the reason.

I know why I did it.

I did it because I was fucking lonely and some company is better than no company at all.

There.

That’s my reason.

Maybe it wasn’t dignified.

Maybe I really was a doormat.

Maybe it wasn’t romantic or friendly or even cool, which is what I told myself at the time I was doing it.

So judge away all of you.

At least I had company at night.

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