A long time ago, I bought myself a St. Pauli Girl costume.
Little did I know how much use I was going to get out of it.
I wore that costume when I poured beer to raise money for charities.
And I wore it to my German friend’s birthday party (both times).
I also wore it to Oktoberfest celebrations and even on playa as a trick-or-treat costume.
Sadly however, the costume has bit the dust.
Well, I’m ASSUMING that it bit the dust since I can’t seem to find it since I last wore it.
I think in a fit of nonchalance, I carelessly “retired it to the round file,” instead of giving it a proper send off (three beers, a shot of Feigling, and some loud tuba music).
As it happens, I have three other “Oktoberfest” costumes, however NONE of them are authentic.
They’re green and pink, blue and white, brown and yellow.
What I want is a REAL St. Pauli Girl costume, and I have been searching high and low for just that.
Red skirt, blue apron, black corset, white blouse.
How HARD could that be?
Turns out. . . VERY HARD!
Hence the reason why I have THREE alternate Oktoberfest costumes.
So you can imagine how THRILLED I was to discover the EXACT SAME St. Pauli Girl costume on Amazon. . . and IN MY SIZE!
I’m sure everyone will be BEYOND ECSTATIC to see that my ass no longer peeks out from under a skirt that is two sizes too small for me to wear.
Or will they?