Revelation

My marriage started in February of 1996 and ended in September of 2004.

At the time, I remember my ex-husband trying to coerce me into staying together by telling me that no one would want me since I had kids.

I thought he was ludicrous.

But here I am 14 years later and I’m still single and HONESTLY, I really need to examine the reasons why.

Because I’ve had several boyfriends but nothing long term.

And the only similar factor in all those relationships is ME.

The other day, I took a good long look at all my failed relationships and asked myself, “WHAT HAPPENED?”

And as TEMPTED as I might be to say, “Something is obviously wrong with me” or “Something is obviously wrong with them,” the reality is NOBODY IS WRONG.

When I got married the first time, I was looking for someone with a nice ass, great cheekbones, and a decent personality.

And that’s exactly what I got.

Plus two INCREDIBLY handsome and extraordinary boys!

But I missed out on intellectual stimulation, emotional connection, and similar values.

And I’ve been looking for those things ever since.

Boyfriends #1, #2, and #3 may have come closer to what I’m looking for but in the end I can draw only one conclusion:

I am single because I’m smart enough to know that I haven’t met anyone yet with whom I could have a successful marriage with.

Ta da!

Nothing wrong with me.

Nothing wrong with them, although I still take offense at the one who left me during a miscarriage.

I see people ALL THE TIME who are in sucky relationships.

I occasionally wonder, “What the HELL is wrong with ME?  If SHE/HE can find a partner, why can’t I?”

And then it hits me.

I’m single because I’m BETTER AT RELATIONSHIPS, not because I suck.

And that, dear readers is a revelation.

2 thoughts on “Revelation

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