Latex Farts be Damned

I’ve been thinking about the ABC Party a lot lately and wondering WHAT IN THE HELL AM I GOING TO WEAR?

I don’t really have the time to learn how to craft something out of paper, plastic, or cardboard.

What’s a girl to do?

Why, LATEX of course!

You know, that stuff that the Kardashians wear on a regular basis which is TECHNICALLY used by doctor’s performing surgery. . .

You have to POWDER your body to slip into it.

I once bought a few pairs of latex panties and the pain of putting them on was only eclipsed by the utter and complete DISASTER of trying to get them off (to a chorus of latex “balloon” farts).

It’s NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE to peel them off your body when it’s moist, is what I’m saying.

So I know what I’m getting into when I say I’m thinking of buying an all latex outfit for this shindig.

The thing that I really like about this outfit is that it reminds me of Trinity in The Matrix.

Could there be any cooler chick in the universe?

So the bottom line is I am SERIOUSLY considering wearing an ALL LATEX outfit to the ABC Party.

Latex farts be damned!

One thought on “Latex Farts be Damned

  1. I wish I was your neighbor. I’d make you something! I was awake this morning and thinking about what sort of costume a person could create. I so want to make a poodle skirt and sweater! The skirt would be out of dollar store table cloths (cuz they come in every size!) and ‘sewn’ together with a duct tape waist and velcro or a button loop sort of thing. The top would be like quilt batting, but only the much cheaper stuff. It’s also large and you could sew it with a tapestry needle. I kept thinking about those bath scrubbies, too…they need to be added somewhere! I like the latex, but oh…Michelle, I wish I was near you!!

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