I had a date last night.

It was with a man who (I was positive) was a “SURE” thing.

He basically begged me to come over his house after we shared some provocative pics the night before.

Needless to say, I took special care when getting ready.

I bathed (always important).

I shaved (even my legs).

I refreshed my makeup and put on lipstick.

I was all set to roll in the hay, should the opportunity present itself.

And I full expected the opportunity to present itself.

I should know better.

As it turned out, he was not a sure thing.

Not even close.

I instigated a hug when I met him.

I kissed his cheek.

I flirted with him over dinner.

I don’t know how I find these guys.

Finally, after making small talk for about 3 hours, I asked if he wanted a drive home.

He’d walked the 0.3 miles from his house to the restaurant.

I was being polite, but secretly I was hoping for an invitation in.

He turned me down.

And gave me a dry peck on the lips goodbye with these parting words. . .

I’M TRYING TO BEHAVE.

I don’t want you to BEHAVE!

I want you to do wild and crazy things with me!

So there you have it.

My SURE THING was a TOTAL BUST.

It could only happen to me. . .