Binge Quilt for the Holidays

It’s been a while since I quilted.

It’s not that I lost interest, it’s just that my free time is so limited and I tend to lose steam when I can’t quilt for hours on end, so I felt it best not to start a new project.

But with 18 days off for the holidays, I had the time to work on a quilt.

Instead of working with my own pattern (I considered making a Storm At Sea quilt), I opted to use one by Konda Luckau from McCall’s Quilting Spring 2013.

This time I kept track of my hours while quilting and I can tell you with certainty that this quilt is a 48 hour quilt.

It’s a gift for Barbara.

The inner alternating hourglass and 9-patch squares consist of Bird Pond fabrics by Tilda Fabrics.

The outer frame is made from a beautiful hummingbird, butterfly, and floral print called Hummingbird Bouquet by Elizabeths Studio.

In case Barbara didn’t already know that I love her and cherish our friendship, now she knows.

ABC

New party.

New theme.

This time the theme isn’t black or white.

Dr. Seuss.

Or Saints and Sinners.

No, this time the theme is ABC.

Do you know what ABC is?

It’s ANYTHING BUT CLOTHING!

Which means I have to CONSTRUCT my outfit out of vinyl, plastic, cardboard, rubber, or anything non-fabric.

I’m at a loss.

My first thought was garbage bags:

I suppose you just “stitch” it together with duct tape?

Then I started thinking why not wear a BOX?

But then I realized that I’d need a pretty BIG box to feel like there’s any decent coverage of my lady parts.

So I scratched that idea.

Now I’m thinking that perhaps I could make a dress out of duct tape and a paper pattern.

Just lay tape down over the paper, cut and sew the “clothing.”

Some people have come up with some pretty clever designs.

But honestly, I’m thinking it might be fun to go shopping for a dress at a hardware store or a grocery store and see what I can come up with. . .

It’s raining fish!

A few friends and I took to the seas and went fishing this past weekend.

We were fishing for crab and rock cod.

Despite the fact that I kept getting called “sweetheart” by the deck manager, I had a GREAT time.

Getting up at 3:45 am is not ideal, but it allows you to catch sights like the sunrise over the city.

And the Golden Gate Bridge as seen from the water

It took us 3 hours to motor out past the Farallons to our fishing “hole.”

I literally dropped my line in the water and came out with a fish.

It was RAINING FISH.

In the end, after about 4 hours of fishing, I caught 10 fish – mostly medium size rock cod.

Some were olive colored, some were red, and others were bright yellow.

It was rather amazing to see the diversity.

One guy on our boat caught a behemoth!

The thing was over 2 feet long and must’ve weight a good 20 – 30 pounds.

On our way back home from fishing, we stopped and checked our crab pots and we’d caught enough crab for everyone on the boat to get two crabs each.

A deckhand was kind enough to give me two extra so I had 6 crabs, including Tejas’ crabs.

I took the crabs to the bait shack when we got back and left them to be cooked and cleaned.

And that’s when it happened.

Someone STOLE MY CRAB.

Just walked off with the bag of my cooked and cleaned crabs, leaving me with my worthless claim ticket.

But the guys cooking the crab took mercy on me and managed to get me 6 other crabs to take home.

So all is well that ends well.

Still.

Someone stole my catch!

Bad form!

BOOBS!

michelleYes, this is a(nother) post about boobs.

The other day, a friend of mine told me that her nickname is “Boobs.”

Not surprisingly, she has a very impressive rack.

When I first met her, she was wearing a skull corset that set off her assets to PERFECT display.

And the other day at her birthday party, a friend took a group photo then made a point of zooming in on her cleavage and showing the rest of the group how LOVELY it was.

They ooohed and aaahed over it.

I felt sort of awkward, sitting at a table with modestly endowed women modestly dressed, being one of the few women there with impressive cleavage and rather immodestly putting them on display.

The woman sitting across from me told me she’d kill to have boobs like my friend and I.

I started to picture all the ways in which having big boobs is an asset:

  • Sneaking booze into concerts
  • Stuffing money/lipstick in your bra
  • Hiding sushi when you’ve taken too much at the all-you-can-eat sushi bar
  • Talking your way out of speeding tickets
  • Filling out a bikini
  • And so much more. . .

Sure, they often come with a bigger butt and thicker thighs but overall, I LOVE my boobs.

They’re one of the few things I actually LOVE about my body.

So score one for the well-endowed.

And cheers to “Boobs” for inspiring her friends’ admiration and awe!

Campbell Santa Rampage

The Campbell Santa Rampage has come and gone, but it’s left a lasting impression in my memory.

Imagine a room FILLED with red Santa Clauses, the Ghost of Christmas Past, Elves, and (of course) reindeer.

I had an online meeting right before the Rampage, so I sat in my room, with my camera turned off and attended the meeting WHILE I PAINTED MY FACE LIKE A REINDEER.

Personally, I think it turned out pretty good!

All in all, I’d say about 60 – 100 people showed up and lit up downtown Campbell with cheer and good will.

We had a great little loop of restaurants, pubs, arcades, and clubs:

  1. Lvl Up Arcade
  2. Katie Blooms
  3. Khartoum
  4. Sushi Confidential (yummy sake bombs)
  5. Aqui (watch out for the swirls)
  6. Campbell Brewing Company
  7. Cardiff Lounge

I stuck to beer the whole time (with the exception of a few sake bombs) and I had a blast.

My son picked me up at the end and took me home to chill and enjoy all the pictures from the Rampage being posted to social media.

All in all, a GREAT time.

Can’t wait for next year!

Hiking Half Dome in Yosemite

Many MANY years ago, I hiked to the top of Half Dome in Yosemite with my friends Robin, Albert and Barry.

I figured I’d never be in better shape than I was then so I might as well complete the 18+ miles round trip hike and see the views from the top.

Me and my companions slept in and so we didn’t get a start up Half Dome until around 11 am.

Oh, was that LATE to start!

I remember as we made our way down the trail a mounted Park Ranger stopped her horse long enough to poke fun at us, “Nothing like an early start up Half Dome.”

Or some such nonsense.

Albert was not having any of her smart assery.

He mocked her for the next few miles.

Somewhere along the way, we lost Robin.

Her shoes weren’t gripping the terrain as well as they should have so she stopped at a rest area and read a book while the three of us kept on.

It was A LOT OF HIKING.

In retrospect, we DEFINITELY fell into the category of PEOPLE WHO HIKE HALF DOME TOTALLY UNPREPARED FOR IT.

It took damn near forever, but around 3 pm, we managed to reach the base of Half Dome.

If you’ve never been to Half Dome, THIS is what you see when you reach the base:

A rickety little “staircase” attached to the rock face, with periodic wood beams attached like stairs so you can rest securely on the rock.

One side of the ladder is people going up, the other side is people going down.

So don’t go thinking that you get the WHOLE ladder to yourself, now.

Albert blasted ahead, eager to get to the top.

I labored.

I’m not sure I would have made it up to the top at all if it hadn’t been for Barry who kept cheering me on and encouraging me to keep setting one foot ahead of the other.

Finally, Barry and I crested the ridge and arrived at the top of Half Dome.

This is us at the top:

The adventure didn’t end there.

Oh no.

By now, we were starving, having gone through our food and water, so we hightailed it back to Robin at the rest area and continued our climb down the mountain.

By the time we reached the valley floor, Albert’s knees had given out on him.

Even though it was a full moon, very little light reached us beneath the tall sequoias.

Fortunately, I brought one little rickety flashlight to guide us.

And EVENTUALLY we made it back to our car, back to our camp, and back to our lives.

It was QUITE the adventure and I’m so glad I did it.

I’m also infinitely thankful for Barry’s support getting up Half Dome.

Yes, we should’ve brought more food and water.

Yes, we were silly youngsters oblivious of the commitment it took to hike Half Dome.

But WE DID IT!

Spa Day

For the Bare Burn, the lovely leadership team bought me a gift certificate to Burke Williams Spa and I’m happy to report that I used the whole thing up yesterday.

Indeed.

But first, a little about what happened BEFORE the massage. . .

Traffic around Santana Row is ATROCIOUS and I got in a car accident.

Actually, it wasn’t a car accident, but I came SO CLOSE to rear ending someone that in my head I was mentally prepared to hit their car.

But wonder of all wonders, I didn’t make contact.

There must have been about A CENTIMETER between our bumpers.

So there’s that.

Then I had to search and search for a parking space.

By the time I found one, I NEEDED A MASSAGE just to relax.

Anyhow, I arrived only to discover that their hot tub was BROKEN, so no soaking.

I was disappointed but determined to use the steam and sauna instead.

Barbara joined me and we steamed and chatted while eating frozen grapes.

We sucked down spa water as we waited for our massages.

Then I went into my massage (with a male therapist, YIKES!).

But I took it like a champ and let him massage me and IT WAS VERY RELAXING.

He did a great job.

When I was driving in, I remember thinking, “I wish I could ask for a back scratch, because that would be FABULOUS!”

And it’s like the universe heard me because my masseur slipped on rough silk gloves, dripped warm massage oil on my back, and massaged/scratched my entire back.

It was so lovely.

By the time my massage was through, you could’ve poured me into my clothes, I was so chill.

I gotta say, as far as massages go, it was ONE OF THE BEST I’VE EVER HAD.

I quickly forgot the madness of trying to get there and found myself floating in a sea of warm, tranquil touch.

Text time, uber!

 

I need a dog

Pints and Pups was this weekend.

I dragged myself out of bed, picked up Barbara, and headed over to Golden State Brewery in Santa Clara for some snuzzles with doggies and BEER!

It was fun to see old friends and to hang out with Barbara.

Drinking beer.

Barbara, in case you didn’t know it, is my “sister.”

We look so much alike people mistake us for sisters.

I got to check out the rescued dogs brought to the event by Thulani Senior German Shepherd Dog Rescue.

They rescue senior German shepherds that have been abandoned by their owners in their old age.

It’s heartbreaking.

I got the feeling like these dogs were searching the crowd for their person and not finding him or her.

They kept looking off into the distance.

Oblivious of my attempts to garner their attention.

But I loved on the doggies anyway and perhaps even signed myself up to volunteer with Thulani next weekend.

Of course, you MUST know that my favorite breed of dog is German shepherd, on account of I’ve had two and they were THE BEST DOGS.

I miss them terribly.

So I was incredibly pleased when friends took it upon themselves to paint an image of my Wendy girl from a picture I gave them.

It’s stunning!

Warms my poor little heart to see her again, in a painting.

This is actually a picture of Wendy around 3 years old, taken when I was rescuing her from the Tri-Valley Animal Shelter.

She somehow managed to sit long enough for me to snap a photo.

Wendy was never the sort to sit still for any length of time, so I was especially pleased I managed to get that photo of her.

And just like this picture of Mac (below), my first white German shepherd, it has become my quintessential photo of Wendy.

I need a dog.