Every now and then I wonder about my strange and unusual background.

HAI workshops.



Burning Man.

Lots of fringe activities, exploring self and relationships with others.

I don’t often talk about it on this blog because it’s hard to put into words what it feels like to probe the edges of myself and explore the depths of my identity.

But that’s the task I was faced with yesterday after conversing with an old friend, who just so happens to be Swedish.

I am forced to admit that all these things I’ve done suddenly made more sense to me.

Even learning the Swedish language to impress a man who is now married to someone else.

Instead of feeling like a collection of failed hobbies, I feel like a whole and complete woman.



Ready to take on the challenges before me and see what lies ahead.

Bring it on.

Is Meetup the new Tinder?

Sorry for the missing and recycled posts.

I’ve been sick and haven’t been blogging as much.

No worries.

It’s not Coronavirus.

It’s a gastrointestinal bug that’s been keeping me under the weather.

I was so sick, I medicated then slept for 12 hours straight.

While I was sick, I got a message from Adam through MeetUp.

MeetUp is a kind of social outing platform for those wanting to adventure out and meet new people while trying their hand at new activities.

It’s not a dating site per se, but it certainly is a good way to meet single men and women.

Looking back through my MeetUp inbox, I discovered over 20 messages, all from single men, seeking an introduction.

How do I feel about MeetUp introductions?

I like them.

Of course most of them didn’t sound like a Knight from the Round Table speaking so formally as Adam.

Most we’re like “Hey there!  We have an interest in common.  Wanna see if we get along?”

It’s touching really that they reached out to connect.

But I prefer to leave MeetUp as an activity platform and Tinder for online dating.

It’s not that Tinder is any better, I just feel like if I want to meet someone organically, I try MeetUp.

If I want to meet someone virtually, I try Tinder.

And right now I have WAY MORE TIME for Tinder than MeetUp.

Who needs a man?

All right.

Let’s suppose for just an instance that I have taken myself off Tinder and am no longer meeting single guys (or married guys who PRETEND they are single).

What’s a woman to do with all her free time if she’s not chatting up men?

Good question. . .

I have absolutely nothing going on this weekend except for dinner plans with a friend.

I had the FORESIGHT to know I’d need some downtime after several weeks of mini road trips.

Especially since next weekend I’m heading to a housewarming party in Monterey followed by a trip to the Renaissance Faire at Casa de Fruita.

I really should throw myself into my activities, the way I did when I was driving race cars, running with the bulls, and kayaking with whales.

Nadine has suggested that I find some meet ups to go to.

She’ll even go with me.

But that’s just more of me trying to meet someone and I really feel like I need a break from all of the noise it’s brought into my life.

I’ve done quite a bit of activities in the Bay Area in the past – from taking beer making classes to whale watching with Barbara and some adult content activities like attending a burlesque show with Yvonne.

So I might have to repeat some of the oldies but goodies.

A few things I haven’t tried yet are:

  • Bocce Ball
  • Cooking School
  • Trivia Night
  • Food Tour of SF (various cuisines)
  • Scavenger Hunt
  • Adventure Course
  • Sushi School
  • Wine School
  • Geocaching
  • Hiking Trails
  • Laser Light Show
  • Brewery Tour
  • Fused Glass Class
  • Wine Blending
  • Improv Class
  • Golf Lessons
  • Horseback Riding
  • Mixology Class
  • Photography Class

It’s also been a few years since I did a boudoir shoot, so it may be time to revisit THAT adventure.

Honestly, I’m tempted the most by photography, glass and horseback riding.

Who needs a man when you have hobbies?

I’m reminded of a well-known social psychologist who gave me the following advice when I told him I was getting divorced 14 years ago:

Get some hobbies.  Volunteer.

From his lips to God’s ears.

If someone who makes $15,000 speaking to the NFL on self-efficacy is going to give me life advice, I’m gonna take it.

Living like a nun

Since my return from Sweden, I’ve been living like a nun.

Even though my vow of celibacy is no longer in place, I’m still not getting any.

Reason #1: I like The Swede and he’s not here.

Reason #2: I sort of consider myself in a transition state right now on my diet.

And I consider “transition phases” inappropriate for dating.

Plus, the last thing I want is to be sipping my low-cal tomato soup while out on a date.

So here I am.

Single yet happy.

To tell the truth I’ve got a lot going on BESIDES my diet that is keeping me occupied.

UnSCruz planning – I’m helping to organize volunteers.

South Bay Burners Regional Precompression aka SoulFire – I’m trying to resurrect this event with guidance from some friends.

Burning Man 2018 – can’t miss That Thing In The Desert.

Pagan Bunny Burn – my very first! Can’t wait!

I mean, I’m not going to turn down any dates that pop up, but I’m also not actively cultivating anything.

Which, remarkably, doesn’t bother me.

All of which is to say that despite my fuller than full physique, I’m pretty damn happy.

So I can’t complain!


I’ve been looking for new adventures to participate in.

Short of learning to surf (scared of sharks) and rock climb (scared of heights), there’s very little for me to do to that’s listed on Groupon and LivingSocial.

I’ve done so much already:

  • Ran with the bulls
  • Joined in a tomato throwing festival
  • Raced cars at Stockton 99
  • Taken two glass blowing classes
  • Learned to make beer in Beermaking 101 and 102
  • Kayaked with whales
  • Went whale watching
  • Kayaked the Elkhorn Slough
  • Went skydiving
  • Took a pottery class
  • Took a blowjob class
  • Learned how to give a lap dance
  • Learned Orgasmic Meditation
  • Took two chocolate making classes
  • Went to Burning Man three times
  • Got scrubbed at the Korean Spa
  • Learned to pole dance
  • Went to a strip club
  • Attended a puja
  • Flown an airplane
  • Attended HAI retreats

And so on and so forth. . .

So I asked myself today, “What’s left?”

And the answer?


That’s right, I want to try tantra.

Of course, how do you learn tantra when you’re single?

Why you attend an Intro to Tantra class that’s open to singles and couples.

Naturally, the teacher I want to take a class from has no open classes for the rest of the year, but I’m going to be on the lookout.

Why do I want to learn tantra?

Well, I’m kind of curious about what I could learn about sex and connection from the practice.

Also, the thought of learning tantra makes me feel slightly uncomfortable but I believe that exploring those edges is where I experience the most growth.

I may have to wait until I’m part of a couple to attend a weekend retreat, but I can always take the intro class to see what it’s about.

Burning Man 2017: Burning Man Expectations

It’s IMPOSSIBLE for me to contemplate Burning Man expectations without thinking of the prophetic words of my Fearless Leader Twisty.

He told me it’s best to just let things evolve on the playa and not try to plan too much.

Did I listen to him?

Not the first year, I didn’t.

I had a WHOLE SCHEDULE filled with plans and activities I wanted to participate in.

Very few actually materialized.

I got to go to the temple and write my messages on the walls.

I went to Scotchfest solo.

And I got washed at the Human Carasss Wash.

That’s about it.

Most of the time I was lonely looking for friends to do stuff with.

My second year was better. I was scheduled to bake cookies for playa interactivity.

Everything else was UP IN THE AIR.

And I had a great time although I do feel like I should’ve done more exploring, less staying at home relaxing in the Motorbeast.

This year, I have a few things on my short list of THINGS TO DO:

Go to Transfoamation and dance in the foam.

Attend Scotchfest. With friends.

Watch the Rite of Spring.

Go to the wedding of my Fearless Leaders.

Short list, eh?

Should be something I can accomplish.

Watch and see

michelle1I am a Scorpio.

No surprise there.

The only reason this has any bearing at all to what I’m about to say is that Scorpios are known to be focused, and determined.

It has been over three months since I gave up internet dating and I have literally not lifted a finger to download any dating apps, click on any email links that appear in my inbox, or swipe right or left.

I’ve left those things behind me, perhaps intuitively sensing that I’m not going to meet anyone through the online dating venue.

Believe it or not, people who use online dating sites may be single but they’re also serial daters – THEY DON’T WANT TO MEET A PARTNER.

They’re happy playing the field.

The last guy I took a chance on left me with a face full of cum.

Therefore, I am still driven to resolve my single status.

I basically HATE not knowing who to take to a wedding, party, etc.

All you coupled up people might bitch about your spouses but at least you know who you’re doing stuff with on a Saturday night.

Maybe you’re stuck having sex with the same person day in and day out, but at least you HAVE someone to get intimate with.

I have no one.

I’ve decided to take a more focused approach to dating.

Here are my goals:

  1. Take the dog to the dog park twice a week.
  2. Have at least one weekly activity with Barbara to keep me sane – even if it’s just brunch.
  3. Reach out to two friends a week to reconnect.
  4. More South Bay Beer Hound activities. I heart beer!
  5. Get out and VOLUNTEER! This is always an EXCELLENT way to look past your own problems to help others.
  6. Take up a hobby – like golf or fishing. I like both activities.
  7. Get out of the house a little more than I usually get out. I tend to be lazy after work and just go home to relax.
  8. Keep going to Burning Man regional events – great places to meet cool, fun, creative people.
  9. Say “yes” more. Be open to new possibilities and stretching myself outside my comfort zone.
  10. Join a writers group to improve my writing and this blog, which I enjoy so much.

Basically, there’s so much I can do to keep busy while still making headway into meeting single men.

Watch and see.

Adventure Classes

michelleSo I stumbled across Verlocal as I was browsing Facebook.

It’s like the smaller, younger, more indie sibling of Groupon and Living Social.

It lists lots of stuff to do in the SF Bay Area – such as arts & crafts, food & drink, outdoor activities, sports & fitness, play, and music.

So far, I’ve identified 10 classes I want to take:

  1. Military Design Class – $27 – Create combat paper out of old military uniforms plus learn the wet process of pulp printing.
  2. Beeswax Candle Making Class – $40 – Make custom candles out of all-natural beeswax.
  3. Sacred Hearts & Skulls in the Mexican Paper Mache Tradition Class – $30 – Create and hand paint a Sacred Heart or Mask in the rich cultural tradition of Mexico.
  4. Book Binding – $45 – Learn how to make a sturdy one-of-a-kind book.
  5. Jam & Jelly Making Class – $65 – Learn to make delicious jams and jellies from scratch.
  6. Beginner Beekeeping Class – $55 – Learn all about bees, beekeeping, and honey. Yum!
  7. All Natural Beauty Class – $45 – Learn to make bath bombs, foot scrub, foot salve, and face mask from all natural ingredients.
  8. Forge Welded Hammers of the Viking Age Class – $375 – Forge-weld hammers from high-carbon steel and mild steel in the traditional technique that was used from before the Viking Era.
  9. Become a Japanese Chef – $80 – Make delicious sushi just like a Japanese chef!
  10. Basic Air Combat Maneuvers Phase 1 – $1395 – Experience the thrill and excitement of flying a light attack fighter in air combat. Woot!

There’s sure a lot of stuff for me to do.

If 2014 was the year of the Boudoir Photos and 2015 was the year of Burning Man, then perhaps 2016 will be the year of the Adventure Classes.

We shall see.

We shall see.

Getting to know you

michelleTo begin with, The Israeli is from Israel so he’s a foreign import with a lovely accent.

He says funny things – like mixing up the words “fluid” and “liquid” – and doesn’t understand some of the colloquialisms that I use – like “you don’t have to tell me that twice.”

I get a kick out of listening to him tell me all his stories.

  • Skiing in the Alps.
  • Diving with sharks in the Red Sea.
  • Camping while in the Israeli Army.

Funny enough, he gets a kick out of all the things I do.

  • Running with the bulls.
  • Learning to make beer.
  • Racing stock cars.

On the surface, we don’t have a lot in common except for our mutual love of rock music.

He would never skydive. I’ve already done it.

He dislikes camping. I adore camping.

He doesn’t go on roller coaster rides. I can’t get through the lines fast enough.

No one ever said you have to date a carbon copy of yourself to find your soulmate.

There are enough qualities to him that fit my criteria to make him an ideal suitor.

Including… ahem… desire #22.

And #1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 10, 11, 12, 13, 15, 17, 18, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 30, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, and 41.

And, of course, he meets the basic criteria – available (divorced), faithful (monogamous), and educated (hello DDS and PhD) which will please my life coach.

Progress, folks.

This is what it’s all about.

What’s on tap?

So I’m trying to plan out my next adventures and I have to say, this would be much easier if I was a couple. Then the “Chocolate Making Class for Two” would be appropriate. Or the “Love Lab” class that teaches couples massage would be ideal for an afternoon’s activities.

But no, I am yet single so I must plan my solo activities accordingly.

Right now, I have tickets to see U2 and I’m planning on going to the 4th of Juplaya with Tejas and friends. Juplaya is celebration of the 4th of July on the Playa, enjoying the surrounding hot springs and fireworks. It should be fun.

But that’s all I’ve got going on and I need to schedule some more activities. To begin with, I’d like to go back to BAGI and make more glass bowls. That was wicked hot, but wicked fun. And I loved the final product which is sitting in the entryway in my home.

As far as activities go, I could:

  • Take horseback riding lessons
  • Learn to golf
  • Go to the batting cages
  • Try my hand at fencing
  • Attempt to learn archery without lacerating my hand, like last time
  • More pilates
  • Study ballroom dance
  • Rock climb at Planet Granite
  • Fly a small plane, again
  • Take an improve comedy class
  • Paintball!
  • Learn to surf
  • Table tennis lessons, so I can beat my cousin Nick
  • More kayaking
  • Learn how to make bread
  • Take a dance class
  • Take that Bollywood dance class I’ve had my eye on for months now
  • Barre3 class, which my friend Christina swears by
  • Bootcamp, ugh
  • Billiards class
  • Introduction to firearms class
  • Piano lessons, refresh my skills on the piano
  • Shoot clays
  • Go river rafting, always fun on a Class 3+
  • Summer festivals!