The diet, thus far

So you want to know how the diet is going?

It’s going.

Truth be told, I’m on a rather bland, mostly liquid, limited diet right now.

I miss flavor. Sauces.

God, I miss chewing!

I’m worried that I will not be successful on this diet on account of it’s so fricking BORING I feel like I’m jonesing for something tasty to eat.

A donut.

Garlic bread.

Macaroni and cheese.

I’d even be happy with a frozen pizza right now.

The trouble is, I’m pre-diabetic.

Which means I DON’T GET TO GIVE UP ON THIS DIET.

My health is at stake.

So I’ve somehow got to find the willpower to stick with the plan.

Originally, I was worried that giving up booze was going to be the hardest thing for me.

Now however, having been on the plan for two days, I must say booze is the LEAST of my worries.

And I was naïve to think that it would be.

By far the biggest impact to my daily diet isn’t the elimination of booze but the elimination of FLAVOR.

And that’s not easy to give up.

Not at all.

You don’t mess with my shoes

I didn’t mind gaining a little weight.

My boobs got bigger. . .

My stomach got a little softer. . .

My curves for a little more curvier. . .

What’s not to love about a little weight gain?

Well, diabetes for one.

High cholesterol for another.

And thirdly there’s join pain.

None of those things are fun and all of them can lead to long term health implications.

Things I don’t want to deal with for sure.

Sure, I am still fun in the sack (at least I used to be before I started this damn sex diet), but I have to say I’m not thrilled with the side effects of weight gain.

Of course, I wasn’t thrilled with being labeled pre-diabetic.

And I wasn’t happy to have elevated cholesterol.

And finding out that I had high blood pressure wasn’t fun either.

But I wasn’t convinced I needed to go on a fucking diet until my shoes stopped fitting me.

Yes.

You can fuck with my cholesterol. You can fuck with my dress size. But the minute you fuck with my shoe collection YOU ARE OUT!