No, I’ve never been to Burning Man, his profile said.
“But as an ad exec, I’ve been all over the world, held photoshoots with supermodels. . .”
Screech!
What?
Supermodels?
Oh HELL no!
Swipe LEFT!
Just one of the profiles I came across on Tinder.
Oh Tinder, how you ENTERTAIN me.
FYI, women don’t like to hear that a potential date has been with supermodels.
The only thing we like WORSE are plastic surgeons and gynecologists.
Here’s a few tips for the men out there:
- DON’T post profiles pics with ex-girlfriends, sisters, cropped out women, women in general ,and MODELS MOST SPECIFICALLY!
- DON’T create a username like “luvs2eatacos” or “bigboi4u.”
- DON’T trash talk her sports team. You’re not her buddy. You’re not her pal. Be nice. Bring YOUR A-game.
- DON’T say you attended the “School of Hard Knocks.” Everyone has. It’s a given. No one skates through life unscathed. This makes you sound like a whiner.
- DON’T say you’re fresh out of a LTR. Everyone knows there’s a wild oats sowing period of time following a breakup.
- DO let your freak flag fly. I want to know what makes you YOU!
- DO post pics of your dog. I love that shit. I’m on the fence about cat pictures, however.
- DO post pics of your travels, but BE IN THE PHOTO. I know what Notre Dame looks like.
- DO use good grammar and punctuation. It’s the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse and helping your uncle jack off a horse.
- DO upload new photos from time to time to see what women respond to. I love it when my old matches upload new photos.
Just my $0.02.
