Standing next to supermodels

It sounds like a nightmare, doesn’t it?

Having to stand next to a supermodel.

What could be worse that being side by side with a leggy blond or brunette with perfectly symmetrical features and cheekbones that could cut wood?

I personally try not to follow too many fashion models on Instagram because it’s bad for my mental health and self image.

I try to follow curve models.

They have curvy butts and thighs and sometimes even a soft belly.

It’s comforting to me to see women with body types like my own.

It makes me feel like less of an unlovable freak and more like a beautiful woman.

I’m not sure beauty magazines understand the impact they have on young women growing up when all they promote within their pages are size 0 models.

It’s a 445 BILLION dollar industry based on convincing women that they need this lipstick, dress, purse, face cream, etc, in order to be beautiful.

I am reminded of a line in “Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen)” that goes something like this:

DO NOT READ BEAUTY MAGAZINES, THEY WILL ONLY MAKE YOU FEEL UGLY.

Beauty magazines are in the business of making beautiful women feel ugly.

When I was younger I loved beauty magazines.

I used to subscribe to several of them and I’d comb through the pages of the magazine picking out makeup, clothes, and accessories that I really wanted.

It gave me a little thrill.

Now, it makes me shudder.

And yet, I am a beauty consumer of the first water.

A VIB Sephora member.

A Platinum member of ULTA.

And I’ll be damned if I don’t also buy makeup from Milani, Beautylish, and elf.

If the amount of makeup we buy is proportional to how ugly we feel inside, then what do my spending habits say about me????

God, there’s a frightening thought.

Burning Man Outfit #1

I put together an outfit cybernetically and I’d like you to tell me what you think of it:

Dress (in t-shirt material, nice and light)

Or this skirt, with a matching top…

Headdress, love all the dread lock-like strings hanging off of it!

Ear cuffs, because you know, MAYBE my ears will show and I’ll need elf-like ears.

And finally, the wings.  Because I want wings.  Aren’t they lovely?

Oh wait, gotta have some fringed boots!

Or maybe these platform boots.  They look HOT though.

Cost per item is:

  • Dress – $99
  • Skirt – $175
  • Headdress – $175
  • Ear Cuffs – $56
  • Wings – $40
  • Boots – $94
  • Platform boots – $85

So what do you think?  Pure shit?  Too hot?  Not exotic enough?  Too much money?  Not enough sin, I mean skin?  Let me know in the comments below.