I “inherited” my friendship with Barbara from my (now defunct) friendship with Danielle.
We met at a Curvy Girl anniversary party.
I remember Barbara was wearing a skull and crossbones corset that looked AMAZING.
We both got henna tattoos and waved our arms in the air like we don’t care, just drying our henna tattoos.
When my friendship with Danielle broke down, I assumed that Barbara would go away too.
But she didn’t.
Barbara and I look like sisters. Even MY OWN FATHER mistakes Barbara for me.
She may be a decade younger than me, but in sense and sensibility, she is a decade more advanced than I.
I aspire to be more like her.
Barbara is also a mystic.
She has the awesome power to observe relationships and predict their outcome based on her SUPERIOR POWERS OF ANALYSIS.
And she has no room for flakes.
I introduced her to my friend Brandon who is a pretty cool black man living in the City.
When he flaked on calling her back for a week, Barbara wrote him off.
DESPITE the fact that she had liked him.
Because Barbara is strong like that.
I am, of course, weak.
So I need someone like Barbara in my life to remind me that when flakiness happens to me, it’s a result of mediocre interest, not busy schedules.
That is why, I’m proud to announce that Barbara has now been accepted into THE INNER SANCTUM.
And what is THE INNER SANCTUM, you wonder?
It’s a small yet elite group of women who enrich my life such that I am devoted to their own happiness and well being.
THE INNER SANCTUM has the power to veto relationships in my life.
Now, men who want to date me need the approval of:
- My sister Lisa
- My friend Michelle
- My cousin Jennifer
- My friend Barbara
I heart THE INNER SANCTUM. Those women always see the best in me and insist that I find a man who sees the same.
Needless to say, we’re still working on that.