Growing up

I’m almost ashamed to admit it.

I’ve been collecting shoes for so long based on how they look, for the first time in my life today I passed up on buying a pair of shoes because of how I think they will feel.

Cripplingly painful, is my assessment.

This is a BIG change for me.

In the past, I’ve never cared how shoes would feel on my feet.

I have several pairs of 2-hour shoes that can attest to that.

That’s right – I have shoes I can only wear for 2 hours at a time before they get incredibly painful and require their removal.

Believe you me, I have memories of a night out wearing black studded stiletto heels with an ankle chain and I REMOVED my shoes while walking the streets of San Francisco.

You know you’re desperate to get your shoes off when you’re willing to walk barefoot through grime instead of wearing them.

I think this signifies a shift in me from spending money on shoes which bring me happiness to buying shoes which don’t hobble me.

I’m growing up after all.

Growing up

I’ve had no dates since returning from Sweden.

It’s not that I’m consciously trying to be loyal to The Swede.

It’s because I simply can’t stomach the quality of men I meet online.

Did you know that one man thanked me for moving my beer on the first date because (as he put it), he “could see my tits better without the glass in the way?”

Mind you, I have behaved no better.

I’m no “holier than thou” woman.


I sent dirty pictures.

I wore low cut dresses.

And I flirted with the best of them.

In the end, online dating is not any way to make a connection with somebody.

Although, I did meet The Swede on Tinder.

Go figure.

One in a fucking billion.

And I had to import him from ANOTHER COUNTRY!

You’d think, given my inclinations, that I’d be missing all those dates, and sexting, and flirtations.

But you’d be wrong.

I’m not missing it ONE BIT.

Maybe it’s because I can skype The Swede whenever I want.

But also?

It’s because I can TEXT The Swede whenever I want.


Maybe he’s a big part of why I’m happy, but he’s not the ONLY reason I’m happy.

I’ve got a hundred other reasons to be happy starting with my boys.

I guess this is growing up.