In praise of men with daughters

I have a couple unprofessional observations I’ve made while dating.

Do not date men who are 45+ who have never been married or had kids.  They tend to be hard to please and uncompromising.

Do not date men who haven’t been divorced longer than 2 years.  They tend to avoid commitment.

Do not date men with a full online dating portfolio of pictures of themselves.  They tend to be self absorbed and vain.

On the flip side, I noticed something that I do appreciate in the men I date.

Daughters.

Yes, men with daughters I have noticed are more compassionate and more patient than men without daughters.

I’ll give you an example:

I was so excited about my upcoming trip to Sweden that I got a Swedish manicure – completed with yellow and blue nail polish and the Swedish flag.

As a woman, I was totally jazzed about my manicure.

So jazzed that I texted The Swede.

Instead of just blowing me off or laughing at my girlishness, he was kind and let me prattle on about my nails.

He even told me they were cool!

I attribute his sensitivity to the fact that he has two daughters and knows how to accommodate the female into his life.

Some men don’t know what to do with it.

And though it’s going to sound awkward coming at the end of a post where I talk about The Swede, without actually admitting anything, I just want to say that I sincerely hope that I wind up marrying a man with daughters.

If for no reason than I find that kind of sensitivity VERY APPEALING.

‘Nuf said.

10 Things I Believe About Dating

1. Whether or not it is clear to you, the universe is unfolding exactly as it should.  Trust in it for the best outcome.

2. Kind should be his first attribute.  We’re just looking for a safe place to call home.  Your heart, above all else, need to be treated with kindness.

3. If he’s not kind to the waitstaff, he will eventually treat you the same way.  Pay attention and choose wisely.

4. Bad sex happens to good people.  But sex is like pizza… even when it’s bad, it’s still pretty good.

5. Drama is for thespians.  It’s a dimension adults create to live out a more heightened existence.  So unless you’re pursuing an Oscar, or your own reality show, leave the drama to the people who study it.

6. You can never say the wrong thing.  The things we are self conscious about , the cringe-worthy secrets, when revealed are the very things that make people like us.

7. Everyone has baggage.  But some people have a matching set of luggage.  It’s all in their approach to life.

8. Suave is overrated.  The truth is the man I want approaching me is the man who is nervous to ask, because he likes me that much.

9. Don’t get tied to outcomes.  Expectations can ruin a budding relationship.  Learn to relax and just enjoy the ride.

10. YOU ARE THE LOVE YOU SEEK.  I stopped thinking about when I am going to meet “the one” because I am in the process of making myself happy.

10 Things I Believe About Dating

1. Whether or not it is clear to you, the universe is unfolding exactly as it should.  Trust in it for the best outcome.

2. Kind should be his first attribute.  We’re just looking for a safe place to call home.  Your heart, above all else, need to be treated with kindness.

3. If he’s not kind to the waitstaff, he will eventually treat you the same way.  Pay attention and choose wisely.

4. Bad sex happens to good people.  But sex is like pizza… even when it’s bad, it’s still pretty good.

5. Drama is for thespians.  It’s a dimension adults create to live out a more heightened existence.  So unless you’re pursuing an Oscar, or your own reality show, leave the drama to the people who study it.

6. You can never say the wrong thing.  The things we are self conscious about , the cringe-worthy secrets, when revealed are the very things that make people like us.

7. Everyone has baggage.  Some people have luggage.  It’s all in their approach to life.

8. Suave is overrated.  The truth is the man I want approaching me is the man who is nervous to ask, because he likes me that much.

9. Don’t get tied to outcomes.  Expectations can ruin a budding relationship.  Learn to relax and just enjoy the ride.

10. YOU ARE THE LOVE YOU SEEK.  I stopped thinking about when I am going to meet “the one” because I am in the process of making myself happy.

All the bells and whistles

My boyfriend model 1.0 has the following standard options:

1. Intelligent
2. Funny
3. Kind
4. Skilled in the bedroom
5. Adventurous
6. Honorable
7. Outdoorsy
8. Romantic
9. Non-violent
10. Likes cats and dogs and kids (boys)

The following upgrades are HIGHLY recommended but not essential:

1. Not afraid of spiders
2. Can karaoke
3. Likes foreign films
4. Owns a kayak
5. Handy with tools
6. Can play a musical instrument
7. Can cook and clean (or can order great takeout and get a maid)
8. Willing to go great white shark diving (in a cage)
9. Loves to travel
10. Loves all kinds of music and performance
11.  Has girls