Pregnancy Test

So there I am, sitting at the kitchen table, when I get a text:

You have new lab results.

Okay.

I took some blood tests earlier that day and the results were rolling in.

Curious, I clicked on the link.

My mom and dad were there (they’re retired doctors) and they asked me to read the results out loud.

I cleared my throat and read the first line:

“Pregnancy Test”

As soon as I read those words, I stopped in my tracks.

Wha?!

My parents eyes widened.

NEGATIVE.

Of course.

Because I haven’t done what you need to do to get pregnant.

What are they doing testing a 45 year old woman for pregnancy, anyway?

But there you go, an awkward family moment brought to you by Kaiser Permanente.