Sh*t Brown

Remember my GENIUS idea of wearing a pink latex dress to the Valentine’s Pub Crawl?

Yeah, one of my LESS THAN BRILLIANT ideas, as it turns out.

The dress actually DID arrive in the mail and lo and behold, it was this shitty brown color.

Now.

I might have known better, had I actually scoped out the website a little more.

They uploaded a picture of a hot looking older broad in the dress and it is CLEARLY not pink.

It’s this yucky porto potty soupy brown.

Yeah, you know what I’m talking about!

So here I am, stuck with a dress I CLEARLY will never wear.

I’m wondering if my local Goodwill will raise their eyebrows if I bring in a shit brown latex dress?

You know, it’s moments like these I realize what stores are for and why internet shopping sometimes SUCKS!

That is all.

Sh*t Brown

Remember my GENIUS idea of wearing a pink latex dress to the Valentine’s Pub Crawl?

Yeah, one of my LESS THAN BRILLIANT ideas, as it turns out.

The dress actually DID arrive in the mail and lo and behold, it was this shitty brown color.

Now.

I might have known better, had I actually scoped out the website a little more.

They uploaded a picture of a hot looking older broad in the dress and it is CLEARLY not pink.

It’s this yucky porto potty soupy brown.

Yeah, you know what I’m talking about!

So here I am, stuck with a dress I CLEARLY will never wear.

I’m wondering if my local Goodwill will raise their eyebrows if I bring in a shit brown latex dress?

You know, it’s moments like these I realize what stores are for and why internet shopping sometimes SUCKS!

That is all.

Two hams in a sausage casing

Well, I tried.

I got invited to a Valentine’s Pub Crawl (well TWO, actually) and I wanted to wear something saucy.

So I went online and ordered something I don’t have in my closet already (if you can believe that).

I ordered a pink latex dress.

Maybe it’s the fact that I’m losing weight, but I suddenly find myself flush with body confidence.

And I wanted to put that body confidence in a latex dress.

I also got a faux fur jacket to match.

And voilà!

Some sort of fun and outstanding outfit for the crawl.

Yes, I was running the risk of putting on the dress only to discover I looked like two hams stuffed in a sausage casing, but hey!

Life is risk, no?

Sadly, hams or no hams, I wasn’t even able to try on the dress because the store I bought it from cancelled my order.

Needless to say I was irritated.

When I put effort into planning an outfit and there is a catastrophic failure of the outfit, I get a little miffed.

But you heard it here first –

Someday, regardless of this botched attempt, I’m going to wear latex!

Woot!