Don’t laugh

….at least don’t laugh harder than me!The lingerie I ordered online arrived in the mail just in time to mock my single status. If you could anthropomorphize a chemise or pee-a-boo babydoll, they would be sticking their tongues out at me, crossing their eyes, and yelling “neener neener neener!”

Here’s a snapshot of the lingerie (and red glitter heels which match my Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz outfit):

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And this is what made me laugh so hard I almost cried. My uber-gorgeous lingerie with matching microscopic thongs (WTF!!!) didn’t come in wrapping paper. Or tissue. Or little silk bags like I get at the lingerie shop downtown.

No…. my lingerie came in BOXES! At first, I wondered why the hell they were sending me pornos!!!

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So, FYI….Trashy.com for lingerie. You can find it all.

Lingerie parties, henna tattoos and vibrators, oh my!

Friday night, I took an impromptu trip to a celebratory anniversary party at a local lingerie shop.

I met up with my girlfriend Danielle, who invited me in the first place. There were lots of beautiful women there (some in lingerie) and the event had a sexy, fun vibe.

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Did I mention the store also sells sex toys?

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Danielle and I got our hands henna tattooed by a phenomenal artist. Any design you wanted took 5 minute.

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Then they brought out the belly dancers.

The belly dancers were hot. Boy could they move. They took over a very small space and owned their femininity. They were gorgeous. Breathtaking.

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Afterwards, we went to the DeAnza for cocktails. We brought along beautiful Barbara who looked this good.

imageThere was a jazz band playing and we relaxed in overstuffed couches while the band played standards like “After Hours,” “Love Letters,” and “You Go To My Head.”

I had an unexpectedly amazing time with Danielle ad beautiful Barbara. We even shared photos of our past lovers and I got Barbara, who loved dark meat, to declare that Austin was “really hot.” Bonus to Austin.

I’ll have to see them again soon.

imageWhat a magnificent evening. Oh, and did I mention that I won the door prize? I won a $150 vibrator!

vibTTFN my friends, from the lovely Danielle and myself.

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