Class of 2020

It’s a thing apparently to post a picture of your high school graduation photo in support of the class of 2020 who will graduate without the custom festivities that surround the occasion.

It has been 30 years since I graduated high school and though I can’t find my high school graduation photo, I did come across a photo of my sister and I AT OUR HIGH SCHOOKL GRADUATION posing for pictures in an area of our school known as The Donut.

Yes, my sister and I are the same age and we graduated together.

As I look back on our high school days I am overwhelmed with the knowledge of how much potential we had back then.

The world was our oyster and we were prepared to devour it.

My sister became a home health care nurse.

She is on the front lines fighting this terrible virus and I am in awe that she can get up every day and take care of patients when I can barely take care of myself and my family.

She is even in the process of getting her Nurse Practitioner license and I am wildly proud of her for all that she has accomplished as a single woman making her way in the world.

I have been decidedly less independent than her, getting married at twenty two, starting a family and raising a beautiful daughter and a headstrong son.

So much life lies ahead of the Class of 2020.

I have no doubt they will make their mark in the world, whatever they decide to do with their lives.

So Happy Graduation to the Class of 2020!

May your road be long and prosperous!

Weird Science

I came up with a new idea for Multiverse:  Burning Man 2020.

Lisa from Weird Science.

She was conjured out of the ether of men’s fantasies by two nerds, what is more Multiverse than that?

It’s been amusing putting together this costume.

To begin with, she’s not wearing a bodysuit, she’s wearing some kind of scoop neck royal blue suspender swimsuit singlet.

Sort of.

Try googling that in a plus size and see what you get. . .

It’s a hodge-podge of baby onesies, swimsuits, and some REALLY OUTSTANDING harnesses for men.

I kid you not.

Just when I thought I’d found the right scoop neck royal blue suspender swimsuit singlet, I looked at the back view and noticed it was a thong.

Uh, no.

Not even with heather gray stockings on.

So I finally found this suspender swimsuit and the designer is willing to make it in royal blue for me:

I could buy a Shermer Phys. Ed. t-shirt already created for $50 but why spend $50 on a tube top when I can custom make my own for $25?

So there you have it, my Lisa from Weird Science outfit.

Just add heather gray tights, men’s striped athletic socks and white sneakers and call it a day:

And then I peed my pants

Elton JohnThe first thing you need to know about my trip to Tahoe to see Elton John is that I am in my early 40s. And although I didn’t realize it at the time I was buying the tickets, that makes me a little young for Elton’s demographic.

When I pointed this out to my sister, the man sitting in front of us said, “I heard that,” and gave us a scowl.

The second thing you need to know is that even BEFORE WE HAD DINNER at a nearby restaurant, my sister and I polished off a fifth of vodka. Yum yum! Thank you very much. We had a nice buzz going which is why we had two glasses of wine each with dinner.

Yeah, I know. You can see where this is headed already.

So we had dinner and drinks and then called a cab to take us to Harvey’s to see Elton John.

My sister had ordered two stadium seats for this event specifically and she told me, “Make sure we don’t forget them.”

Yes, I’m sure you can see where this is going.

While we each drank 4 Lagunitas Sumpin Sumpin beers, Elton John performed:

  • Bitch (which Lisa and I agreed was Gavin’s theme song)
  • Benny and the Jets
  • Goodbye Norman Jean
  • All the Young Girls
  • Levon
  • Tiny Dancer
  • Love
  • Daniel
  • Philadelphia Freedom
  • Goodbye Yellow Brick Road
  • Rocket Man
  • I Guess That’s why They Call it the Blues

And then I got too drunk to actually write anything else down that makes an iota of sense to me now.

But THE BEST PART was how Lisa and I got home.

We actually were so drunk and turned around we couldn’t find our hotel a mere 4 blocks away so we HOPPED INTO A PRIVATE CAR WITH A COMPLETE STRANGER and my sister paid him $40 to drive us 4 blocks to our hotel.

BUT THERE’S MORE…. I had to go to the bathroom so bad, I peed a little in my pants when we were in his car.

Yup.

I peed my pants.

Nice, eh?

What a night!

Burning Man: Getting There, part 1

One of the best parts of Burning Man is getting to go to Reno.

Reno is where my sister lives.

fullsizerender2After getting a SUPER LATE start to Reno*, Tejas and I managed to arrive 5 minutes early for our 6:15 dinner reservations at the Atlantis Steakhouse.

My sister sure knows how to pick a restaurant!

I have two words for you:

LOBSTER BISQUE

Heavenly!

We finished our dinner (and drinks!) and retreated to my sisters house for a little pre-burn party, which sadly did not include her hot tub, but did inclde a taxi ride to Walmart to pick up a handle of vodka and some lemonade.

I’m afraid I got a little loopy but managed to grab an uber with Tejas and return to our hotel.

Big day tomorrow!

 

* SOMEONE woke up late and STILL wasn’t finished packing. . . (HINT:  It wasn’t me)

Weight loss

I have OFFICIALLY lost ten pounds.

10.4 pounds, to be exact.

It may not seem like a lot but I’ve been struggling to lose weight for years and never broke the five pound mark so I’m THRILLED to have finally made some progress.

I’m going to reward myself with a day of pampering with my sister.

That’s right, I’m going to Reno to visit Lisa.

We’re scheduled to get facials and then enjoy a nice dinner out.

Once upon a time, my sister and I were not that close.

She was a hippie in high school and I was a nerd.

We didn’t understand each other.

Add to that the fact that we were ALWAYS together (in the same grade, drive to school together, share a bed on vacation together, etc.) and we sure fought A LOT.

Lisa liked to throw things at me and I liked to break her stuff.

It’s changed now, especially since she lives in Reno.

She’s far enough away that I don’t get to see her on a regular basis.

So I’m SUPER excited that I’ll get to see her in a week and just hang out.

How times change, no?

We’ll see if she can tell that I’ve lost weight.

I personally think I need to make it to twenty pounds before people start to notice but the other day a coworker stopped by my desk and asked, “Have you lost weight?”

I considered joking and saying, “I’m wearing black, which is a very slimming color” but instead I said, “Yes, I have.”

Yes, I have lost weight.

Yes, I’m feeling better about myself.

Yes, yes, yes!

It’s incredible how happy weight loss feels.

I could get used to this.

P.S. In case you’re wondering what I’m doing to lose weight I am walking and following a ketogenic diet.

Girls Weekend

My mom turned 75 at the beginning of January.

We had a party, complete with presents, cake, and candles.

But my sister and I wanted to do something more.

We want to spend time with her.

Create memories.

Give her a break from working for our (blind) father, who can be a handful most of the time.

So we bought her a plane ticket to Reno and she will be flying with me to visit my sister there.

Just a Girls Weekend.

No boys.

There are absolutely no plans.

Sleep in late.

Watch chick flicks.

Eat nice meals.

That’s about it.

With all the heath issues my mom has got going on, I’m happy to have some time to spend with her making memories.

Laughing.

Sipping wine.

It’s so easy to let time slip by and forget what’s important in this world.

My mom and my sister.

LOVE!

And then I peed my pants

Elton JohnThe first thing you need to know about my trip to Tahoe to see Elton John is that I am in my early 40s. And although I didn’t realize it at the time I was buying the tickets, that makes me a little young for Elton’s demographic.

When I pointed this out to my sister, the man sitting in front of us said, “I heard that,” and gave us a scowl.

The second thing you need to know is that even BEFORE WE HAD DINNER at a nearby restaurant, my sister and I polished off a fifth of vodka. Yum yum! Thank you very much. We had a nice buzz going which is why we had two glasses of wine each with dinner.

Yeah, I know. You can see where this is headed already.

So we had dinner and drinks and then called a cab to take us to Harvey’s to see Elton John.

My sister had ordered two stadium seats for this event specifically and she told me, “Make sure we don’t forget them.”

Yes, I’m sure you can see where this is going.

While we each drank 4 Lagunitas Sumpin Sumpin beers, Elton John performed:

  • Bitch (which Lisa and I agreed was Gavin’s theme song)
  • Benny and the Jets
  • Goodbye Norman Jean
  • All the Young Girls
  • Levon
  • Tiny Dancer
  • Love
  • Daniel
  • Philadelphia Freedom
  • Goodbye Yellow Brick Road
  • Rocket Man
  • I Guess That’s why They Call it the Blues

And then I got too drunk to actually write anything else down that makes an iota of sense to me now.

But THE BEST PART was how Lisa and I got home.

We actually were so drunk and turned around we couldn’t find our hotel a mere 4 blocks away so we HOPPED INTO A PRIVATE CAR WITH A COMPLETE STRANGER and my sister paid him $40 to drive us 4 blocks to our hotel.

BUT THERE’S MORE…. I had to go to the bathroom so bad, I peed a little in my pants when we were in his car.

Yup.

I peed my pants.

Nice, eh?

What a night!

Wearing Wasabi

ImageThe sign at the all-you-can-eat sushi bar said that if you order more food than you can eat, you will be charged the a-la-carte price for your sushi.

This weighed heavily on our minds as my sister and I surveyed our table filled with sushi. We were stuffed to the gills and were trying to figure out how to make 20 extra pieces of sushi disappear.

Oh my god, could we do it?!

Being the honest sibling, I just started eating sushi… doing my best to just chew and swallow and not think about how full I already was.

But Lisa, being a little more clever and deceptive, opted to take a different approach.

SHE SHOVED THE SUSHI INTO HER CLEAVAGE!

The waitress came by to check on our progress.  I noticed sushi peeking out of my sister’s cleavage. As the waitress spoke to us, Lisa’s eyes were getting bigger and bigger.  The waitress left.

“What’s wrong,” I asked.

“Listen, we’ve got to get out of here so I can get rid of this sushi. The wasabi is BURNING MY BOOBS!”

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila FLOOR!

While my sister was visiting, we had the brilliant idea of making margaritas at home. I decided if we were having margaritas, we also needed to do shots and so I insisted we pick up a bottle of Patron to do shots with.

Now the thing you need to know about my sister and I growing up, is that she was the naughty one but I always got in trouble. Somehow she always managed to skate free. I claim that this is because I used to cover for her. She claims she didn’t get in trouble because she was not naughty.

LIAR!

In any case, Lisa and I were about one deep in margaritas and two deep into shots when my sister asked me for another shot.

Sure thing. Coming right up.

As I’m pouring it, my mom comes into the kitchen, looks at me and the tequila, and says, “Really Michelle? Another one?” and walks out.

I’m left standing there feeling reprimanded and indignant.

I follow her.

“Just so you know, it’s for Lisa,” I tell her.

Yes, I was a tattletale.

But I felt a whole lot better and my inner child rejoiced for not being labeled the naughty one.

Just the enabler.

Ha ha!

[What I did after 2 shots of tequila and 2 margaritas is a different post]

Lisa

It’s my sister’s birthday today!

Now many people don’t realize this but my sister and I are twins, for all intents and purposes.

My parents adopted us at the same time and we went through school in the same grade through college.

Growing up, when we’d explain to people that we were 5 months apart in age, they’d get confused until we explained that we were adopted.

And then they’d say, “So you’re not really sisters” which REALLY pissed us off.

So we stopped telling people that we were adopted.

We just let people assume we were twins.

Which was easy to do, considering that we looked like each other.

My sister is fierce and strong in ways I only dream of being.

She can keep her head in a crisis and manage just about anything you throw in her direction.

She is a giving person who has had her giving nature taken advantage of, but that never stops her from optimistically jumping into the fray to try again.

In my minds eye, I see us as little old ladies, still getting into shenanigans together.

She’s the instigator, btw.

I picked out the PERFECT present for her this year.

A lacy copper flower windmill.

So HAPPY BIRTHDAY EESE!

I love you!