That won’t fit!

luggageThere comes a time in every woman’s life when she has to look closely, inspect dimensions, and declare “There’s NO WAY that will fit!”

Which is exactly what I did when I stared at the pile of clothes and presents I want to bring to Sweden with me next to the suitcase it all has to fit into.

Quite frankly, I’m more than skeptical that it will all fit.

I’m in disbelief.

It’s just not going to happen folks.

And of course, as is my way, instead of getting rid of the wine or the presents or the makeup, I’m eliminating my clothes.

Who needs clothes anyway?

All I need is a fresh pair of underwear and I’m good to go.

One dress, one sweater, one jacket, warm leggings and VOILÁ!

You have yourself packed for Sweden.

I’d like to say that this time around I’m flying by the seat of my pants, but no.

I’m packed a week ahead of time and I have an inventory.

Because I’m neurotic that way.

The good news is that when I come back, I will be 5 bottles of wine and 2 bottles of champagne lighter than when I left.’

I fully intend to drink and gift the wine to The Swede and his friends and family.

Just in case I meet any of them, I’m prepared.

California wine FOR YOU!

AND FOR YOU!

AND CALIFORNIA SPARKLING WINE FOR YOU!

Happy faces, all around!

10 Things I Believe About Dating

1. Whether or not it is clear to you, the universe is unfolding exactly as it should.  Trust in it for the best outcome.

2. Kind should be his first attribute.  We’re just looking for a safe place to call home.  Your heart, above all else, need to be treated with kindness.

3. If he’s not kind to the waitstaff, he will eventually treat you the same way.  Pay attention and choose wisely.

4. Bad sex happens to good people.  But sex is like pizza… even when it’s bad, it’s still pretty good.

5. Drama is for thespians.  It’s a dimension adults create to live out a more heightened existence.  So unless you’re pursuing an Oscar, or your own reality show, leave the drama to the people who study it.

6. You can never say the wrong thing.  The things we are self conscious about , the cringe-worthy secrets, when revealed are the very things that make people like us.

7. Everyone has baggage.  But some people have a matching set of luggage.  It’s all in their approach to life.

8. Suave is overrated.  The truth is the man I want approaching me is the man who is nervous to ask, because he likes me that much.

9. Don’t get tied to outcomes.  Expectations can ruin a budding relationship.  Learn to relax and just enjoy the ride.

10. YOU ARE THE LOVE YOU SEEK.  I stopped thinking about when I am going to meet “the one” because I am in the process of making myself happy.

10 Things I Believe About Dating

1. Whether or not it is clear to you, the universe is unfolding exactly as it should.  Trust in it for the best outcome.

2. Kind should be his first attribute.  We’re just looking for a safe place to call home.  Your heart, above all else, need to be treated with kindness.

3. If he’s not kind to the waitstaff, he will eventually treat you the same way.  Pay attention and choose wisely.

4. Bad sex happens to good people.  But sex is like pizza… even when it’s bad, it’s still pretty good.

5. Drama is for thespians.  It’s a dimension adults create to live out a more heightened existence.  So unless you’re pursuing an Oscar, or your own reality show, leave the drama to the people who study it.

6. You can never say the wrong thing.  The things we are self conscious about , the cringe-worthy secrets, when revealed are the very things that make people like us.

7. Everyone has baggage.  But some people have a matching set of luggage.  It’s all in their approach to life.

8. Suave is overrated.  The truth is the man I want approaching me is the man who is nervous to ask, because he likes me that much.

9. Don’t get tied to outcomes.  Expectations can ruin a budding relationship.  Learn to relax and just enjoy the ride.

10. YOU ARE THE LOVE YOU SEEK.  I stopped thinking about when I am going to meet “the one” because I am in the process of making myself happy.

Baggage vs Luggage

I hate the term baggage.

The idea that something that happened in the past permanently affects our future bothers me to no end.

Mostly because I don’t like the idea of someone I once loved having that much power over me.

I took away some great things from my previous relationships.  But I also took away some crap.

The ex who dumped me to marry a coworker, that was pretty shitty.

And the ex who dropped me because he said he could never make me happy, breaking my heart, that sucked too.

If I’m honest with myself, I’ll admit I have some residual baggage from those experiences.

  • Relationships make me skittish
  • It takes me a while to open up
  • I have trust issues (don’t we all)

So there you have it.  I have baggage.

What I don’t have is luggage.  Some people have luggage and you know exactly what I’m talking about.  They have a matching set of luggage you can spot a mile away.  And they haul it with great gusto from relationshit to relationshit, daring their new partner to fix what’s wrong.

I’ve met people with luggage.  And they’re remarkably successful at finding people to date, because I suppose there’s a lot of people out there who love a rescue.

I’m always reminded of my baggage every time I meet someone new and I have to share all the funny bits and pieces about myself that I don’t necessarily like but I live with.

Like Tejas.

He mentions relationships and all of a sudden I get that tight, fluttery feeling in my chest and I have the strong urge to run.

What’s that about?

Of course, the panic passes and I feel fine.  But for a moment there I thought I was going to dash.

Sigh.

Fucking baggage.