Choke

For the Fourth of July, I was invited to hang with the new guy in his neck of the woods.

He planned to take me on a tour of his house, show me the new camping trailer, entertain me with his pool table for a little while before heading out to get dinner and see fireworks.

Decent plan, eh?

Did I mention that the new guy keeps cider and water chilled in his truck just in case I get thirsty?

Yeah, he’s that fucking thoughtful.

He really pays attention to the details and it shows.

So there we are, sitting at his house watching comedy sketches in the living room when he gets a phone call from his sister.

And his son.

They’re all gathering for the Fourth of July to watch fireworks and can we join?

The new guy sort of left it up to me.

Would I like to meet his family?

The answer is of course, BUT NOT YET.

It’s an important thing, meeting the family, and I didn’t want to do it a disservice by meeting them before I know exactly where the new guy and I are headed.

Maybe it was a smart move.

Maybe it was a bad idea.

For sure it was a hard thing to do, to just get up and leave earlier than I had anticipated.

But it was the right thing to do.

Right?

What is love?

Is it meeting a new person and falling head over heels for them?

Or is it a gradual increase in affection over time.

To be honest, I’ve always chosen the “head over heels love” over the “gradual increase in affection.”

It just feels right, to have a RUSH of emotion and be completely and totally enamored with a person.

Granted, there is little you can know about a person straight off the bat.

When I fall in love at first sight, I am reacting to my perception of who this new man is and what he looks like, and not the reality of who he really is.

And often times, you get burned when you find out the truth.

So a slow-building, gradual increase in affection seems preferable.

Get to know the REAL person slowly, over time and fall in love with who they really are.

This is the dilemma I’m facing now.

The new guy is great.

A wonderful man.

Great job. Great family. Great location. Ready for a relationship.

There’s nothing bad I can say about him.

So why this hesitation with me then?

Maybe our passion for each other is developing slower than our friendship?

I get that friendship is important but does that mean the visceral longing and desire that I want to feel isn’t?

Because I’m getting the feeling I can have one.

Or the other.

And I want both at the same time.

Hobby Contest

One of the things that happens when you go on a date with someone new is you ask them what their hobbies are.

What do you do for fun?

What are your hobbies?

Tell me something interesting about you.

New Guy and I were texting and talking peripherally about hobbies when he asked, “Do you want to have a hobby contest?”

Oh, it’s on.

I have this little adventure blog called unblunder that I’ve been feeding hobbies for years. No one, and I mean no one, can beat me when it comes to hobbies.

I have too many to count.

I started: I’m a PADI certified Rescue Diver.

Him: I’m a certified water polo coach.

Me: I have my own adventure blog.

Him: Secretary past master Masonic lodge.

I’m not sure what this is, but okay.

Me: I’ve raced stock cars at the Stockton 99 raceway.

Him: Crap.

Him: I am an expert ping pong player.

Me: I’ve been skydiving.

Him: I’ve spearfished a shark.

Me: I ran with the bulls.

Him: I was kidnapped by a leper colony in Brazil.

At this point I laughed and I laughed and I laughed hard. I THOUGHT he was joking, so I followed with my own joke.

Me: I can paint with my toes.

Him: I sailed a 42 foot sloop through a hurricane and tropical storm for 1300 mils in the Atlantic.

Wha?????

Me: We’re you joking, because I was. I can’t paint with my toes.

And this folks is how Michelle becomes impressed with a man. When he sails a boat through a hurricane.

OMG.

New Guy

Lives in Pacific Grove.

Has a 9-year old daughter.

I’ve always wanted to wind up with a man who has nothing but girls.

Seems kinda cool to share my boys with him while enjoying the camaraderie of his daughters.

I could use more feminine energy in my life.

In any case, he is rather nice.

I’d like to pat myself on the back for picking a good one.

It remains to be seen if he has any of those offensive qualities that so many of the men I date seem to have.

But so far so good (he hasn’t asked to cum on my face or see my tits).

We’ve bonded talking about our dogs.

He has Luna.

I have Wendy.

In my experience, dog people are good people, so this is just more proof (in my mind) that he’s a decent guy.

I could use a nice guy at this junction in my life right now.

Ironically, his username has the word “jaded” in it, which of course I asked about because hey, if he’s truly jaded, I think that I’ll take a hard pass.

But no, turns out he just uses it because he thinks it makes him sound edgier. Cool.

Cool?

Cool would be ubiquitous. Or auspicious. Or chivalrous.

But jaded?

We shall see. . .