Cheap booze but top shelf ambiance

The Swede is not coming to unSCruz this year.

Yeah, I cried like a baby when I found out.

It was SO MUCH FUN last year.

It was especially fun having him there for the wedding, my strip tease to George Michael’s Freedom, and all the costumes!

AND, I got laid A LOT, so there’s that!

This year his daughter is having knee surgery so his absence is understandable.

I hope she has a speedy and peaceful recovery.

But planning for unSCruz and the Pagan Bunny Burn with or without my Swede has got me going through all my camping totes and organizing ALL MY SHIT.

And wouldn’t you know it, I’ve lost my stove!

How a person loses a stove, I will never know.

It’s BRIGHT RED, after all, and takes up a considerable amount of space.

Fortunately, I found my backup one, but it’s EVEN BIGGER and takes up EVEN MORE SPACE.

The irony is, I’ve also lost my flatware and dinnerware.

I suspect they’re off partying with my stove.

So I got replacements – new flatware and new dinnerware.

And because I’m neurotic, I also bought placemats.

Who in their RIGHT MIND eats off of placemats when they’re camping, I don’t know?

But I can tell you I drew the line when I was tempted to buy chargers for meals (the plates that go UNDER your dinner plate and only serve the purpose of being pretty and dressing up the table).

That impulse buy I resisted.

But I did get a paper towel holder, a flatware caddy and a collapsible kettle.

It’s ironic, isn’t it?

We go camping to get away from it all yet we haul all this CRAP out with us to make it more like home.

Don’t even get me started on lighting and music.

Fortunately, that seems to be Tejas’ area of expertise, so I’ll just leave him to it.

We’re sure to have a nice little shady patch of ground with slick lighting and mood music.

We may buy cheap booze, but we have top shelf ambiance.