Breathless

I’ve fallen in love.

Yes, I have.

It’s such an easy thing for me to do.

I fall in love ALL THE TIME.

This handbag, for instance, caught my eye and I fell INSTANTLY in love with it.

The pistachio-caramel tropical scent of Brazilian Bum Bum Cream captured me as well:

But what I’m really hinting at, is this GORGEOUS red dress I found:

I can’t even BEGIN to tell you how much I love it!

It’s striking and I can’t wait to wear it in Florida and see The Swede get all flushed with excitement.

There’s nothing quite like a beautiful woman in a red dress now, is there?

Wearing red dresses is kinda my thing, as evidenced by this old picture of me with my friends going out for a night on the town:

And then there’s my custom-made velvet high school prom dress, inspired by Pretty Woman, which I wore to my college junior ball:

The bottom line is:

I LOVE RED DRESSES!

I can’t wait to steal someone’s breath away. . .

Red Horny Devil

So.

I got invited to a Good ‘n Bad themed burner (as in Burning Man) potluck birthday party.

Naturally, I bought my costume MONTHS ago.

I got myself a naughty nun costume.

nunPERFECT for me since I sway between abstinence and nymphomania.

Well, the other day I tried to put the costume on.

TRIED, being the operative word here.

The sleeves wouldn’t even fit over my WRISTS!

Now, I’m not sure what size body the costume was DESIGNED for, but I’m pretty sure it’s not an XL like it says on the label.

Not one bit.

Needless to say, I was back at square one.

Time to come up with something different.

And fast!

So I poked around in my closet and found this lovely red dress I’ve never worn WHICH FITS MY BODY.

rred dressAnd then I scoured etsy (my FAVORITE place to shop for eccentricities) for red devil horns and I found these for a mere $8.

PERFECT!

red hornsSo there you have it, a RED HORNY DEVIL costume for $8.

Am I awesome, or what?

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