I was approached by a guy who wants to have a relationship with me.
Not a traditional relationship, however (if there is such a thing).
No, he wanted to create a Relationship By Design.
It has a start date and an end date and rules that get followed.
For a moment, I paused and considered his proposal.
At a brief glance, his proposal seemed okay.
But then I thought about it more.
And the more I thought about it, the less I liked it.
First of all, if I’m going to throw myself into a relationship, it’s with someone who sees himself with me now and in the foreseeable future.
Not someone who is comfortable giving US an end date.
Why be with someone who only SORTA wants me?
And then there’s the rules – nice little boundaries put in place to sanitize/stabilize the “relationship” and make it palatable for both parties.
It’s like both parties agree to give 60% or so and the relationship is supposed to work???
That’s when I knew in my bones that THIS WAS NOT FOR ME.
I don’t want rules. I don’t want end dates. I don’t want to compartmentalize my relationship.
Not with him. Not with anyone.
It feels like a Relationship by Design is a way to create a relationship that’s not meant to work and give it a temporary shelf life so that the parties involved can half ass get their needs met.
And I don’t’ half ass anything.
I’m the whole ass or nothing.