Many snores

I just took a trip to Reno to visit my sister.

We got facials and used the facilities at the Spa Toscano at The Peppermill.

It was ah-mazing!

I actually fell asleep during my facial and woke myself up when I snored.

Yup, I snored in the middle of my facial.

Twice!

I was obviously SO RELAXED!

In the women’s locker room, there were several spa features:

  1. A hot tub
  2. A cold plunge
  3. A steam room
  4. A sauna

Personally, I stripped naked and jumped in the hot tub.

I was surprised to see all the other women in swimsuits.

Even a bridal party of seven skinny women did not have the balls to strip naked in the ladies locker room.

Given the opportunity to get naked, I ALWAYS get naked.

In fact, hanging out at the spa made me miss Lupin Lodge in the Santa Cruz mountains, where you can walk around naked as they day you were born in the beautiful sunshine.

My sister and I eventually put on swimsuits and went to the Caldarium (an indoor area with a soaking pool and hot tubs where you can eat and drink).

She soaked in the pool while I hung out in the hot tub.

Afterwards, we got to eat at the Bimini Steakhouse at The Peppermill and I KID YOU NOT, we both ordered the filet mignon and the Australian lobster tail and when our food arrived, there were TWO LOBSTER TAILS FOR EACH OF US.

Too much food to eat, so we basically forced ourselves to eat the lobster tails and took most of our filet mignon home.

A dessert of cherries jubilee, and we were finished with our day of pampering.

Reno might not be the city you think of when you think of a weekend of pampering and relaxation, but I’m here to tell you it is.

I wish you all many snores!

Weight loss

I have OFFICIALLY lost ten pounds.

10.4 pounds, to be exact.

It may not seem like a lot but I’ve been struggling to lose weight for years and never broke the five pound mark so I’m THRILLED to have finally made some progress.

I’m going to reward myself with a day of pampering with my sister.

That’s right, I’m going to Reno to visit Lisa.

We’re scheduled to get facials and then enjoy a nice dinner out.

Once upon a time, my sister and I were not that close.

She was a hippie in high school and I was a nerd.

We didn’t understand each other.

Add to that the fact that we were ALWAYS together (in the same grade, drive to school together, share a bed on vacation together, etc.) and we sure fought A LOT.

Lisa liked to throw things at me and I liked to break her stuff.

It’s changed now, especially since she lives in Reno.

She’s far enough away that I don’t get to see her on a regular basis.

So I’m SUPER excited that I’ll get to see her in a week and just hang out.

How times change, no?

We’ll see if she can tell that I’ve lost weight.

I personally think I need to make it to twenty pounds before people start to notice but the other day a coworker stopped by my desk and asked, “Have you lost weight?”

I considered joking and saying, “I’m wearing black, which is a very slimming color” but instead I said, “Yes, I have.”

Yes, I have lost weight.

Yes, I’m feeling better about myself.

Yes, yes, yes!

It’s incredible how happy weight loss feels.

I could get used to this.

P.S. In case you’re wondering what I’m doing to lose weight I am walking and following a ketogenic diet.

Heaven

A small detail you may not know about me:

I live with my blind father.

He lost his eyesight maybe 10 years ago and requires a lot of help and assistance – for meals, activities, house chores, etc.

Needless to say, my mom bears the brunt of most of the work, but I help out where I can.

But it’s A LOT of work.

So last weekend, my sister and I flew my mom to Reno (where my sister lives) for a weekend away.

We were also celebrating my mom’s 75th birthday!

We slept in.  Helped with setting up some furniture for my son (who will be attending UNR in the fall and living with my sister), had an awesome meal at a lovely restaurant, and just generally relaxed.

It was heaven!

One thing we did, which we LOVE to do, was paint pottery.

I still have pottery I made in grade school during Mr. Fairman’s art class – a mug with a big bulbous nose which holds pens for me.

Here are the pieces we painted:

Honestly, I had a wonderful time.

And considering that I left Reno to host 10 events in 10 days at work, I needed the R&R.

I had a great time with my mom and my sister.

I think too often I take their presence in my life for granted and it was nice to slow down a bit and focus on them for a weekend.

Girls Weekend

My mom turned 75 at the beginning of January.

We had a party, complete with presents, cake, and candles.

But my sister and I wanted to do something more.

We want to spend time with her.

Create memories.

Give her a break from working for our (blind) father, who can be a handful most of the time.

So we bought her a plane ticket to Reno and she will be flying with me to visit my sister there.

Just a Girls Weekend.

No boys.

There are absolutely no plans.

Sleep in late.

Watch chick flicks.

Eat nice meals.

That’s about it.

With all the heath issues my mom has got going on, I’m happy to have some time to spend with her making memories.

Laughing.

Sipping wine.

It’s so easy to let time slip by and forget what’s important in this world.

My mom and my sister.

LOVE!

She’s crafty!

Yesterday was art day for my sister and I.

First we had a delicious vegan breakfast at Grate Full Gardens in downtown Reno.

Then we went to the Nevada Art Museum and stared at art.

This was outside and made me think of Burning Man:

We were so INSPIRED by the art we saw we decided to try our own hand at it and went to Clay Canvas to paint pottery.

I started with a small blank platter.

I added a little paint and voila. . . a nice cheese platter for my mom:

What amused me about the whole painting process is that my sister and I picked up a bottle of wine to sip and enjoy while we were painting.

Right next door to The Clay Canvas is a restaurant that sells bottles of wine to go.

It’s a match made in heaven.

So we got our bottle of wine, slipped it into a brown baggie, and opened it at the pottery store.

Since we didn’t have cups, I grabbed two dixie cups.

Classy, eh?

Well, the hostess at the clay store OBVIOUSLY thought this was insane, because she came to us while we were sipping out dixie cups and she handed us two clear plastic cups.

I mean, it’s okay to drink wine while you paint, but could you please drink your wine out of a proper cup?

That’s my sister and I – always classing up a joint!

Perverted and inappropriate

I am once again taking off and going to RENO for a weekend.

No, it has nothing to do with Burning Man.

I’m going to visit my sister.

And she’s taking me to the Spa at the Peppermill for massages!

Woot!

However, she requested MALE massage therapists for us.

She says they give better deep tissue massages than a woman therapist.

This gives me pause.

First of all, I’m not too fond of DEEP TISSUE massages.

They tend to make me cry and BEG for mercy.

Second, I’m not too thrilled to have a man working on me.

It’s not that I object to a man massaging me.

It’s just that I do watch a lot of massage parlor porn.

Throwing a man into the mixture makes me tense up and think about sex.

A lot.

Because I’m perverted and inappropriate like that.

Can’t I just have a female therapist and enjoy a nice Swedish massage. . .

. . .then go to Sweden and give a nice sexy massage to The Swede.

I wouldn’t mind if he massaged me.

On the inside 😉

Burning Man The “Easy” Way

I’m going to Burning Man for the third time this year.

And I’m really looking forward to exploring the playa with Yvonne, Tejas’ former lady love (did I mention they split?).

We’re all piling into his RV, the Motorbeast, and camping together at Burning Man.

But this year there’s a twist.

I am flying in and out of Reno and taking the Burner Express to and from the playa.

Best of all, I get to see my sister who lives in Reno the Saturday before the burn and the Monday after the burn.

Did I mention that she has a waterfall shower and a hot tub?

It will feel SO AWESOME after the burn to take a luxurious shower and soak in her hot tub.

I feel like each time I go to Burning Man, I capture a little more of it’s flavor.

My first year, I struggled.

My second year, I started to have fun.

This year hopefully the trend continues and I spend more time exploring and less time in camp.

I wish I could pack up The Swede and take him with me to Burning Man.

I think he’d have a great time checking out the art and interactivity.

But I don’t think that will happen this year, so I’m resigned to finding ways to really enjoy myself with Tejas and Yvonne.

As much as it’s possible to have a great experience at Burning Man going as a solitary person and making your own fun I find that for me, the most fun I can have is sharing my experiences with others.

Someday perhaps I will share Burning Man with The Swede.

For now, my partners in crime are Tejas and Yvonne.

And that’s a lot!

Learning to be subtle

I have 5 tattoos.

I got them all within a year of turning 40.

I’d go to Reno to visit my sister and I’d come back with a new tattoo.

The last tattoo I got was a watercolor butterfly on my foot.

It got infected. . .

. . .on account of me going in my sister’s hot tub RIGHT AFTER I got the tattoo.

No worries.

My sister ripped me a new one.

And the process of clearing up the cellulitis was awful.

I thought my foot was going to fall off.

At work, I usually keep my tattoos covered up.

I don’t put them on display like I do at Burning Man or Burning Man events.

Remember that one time I shoved my crotch in a man’s face in order to show him my hip tattoos?

Yeah, I’m more subtle about it now.

Today I accidentally left for work in a sundress and to my surprise I had no sweater in my truck.

So I’m sitting in my cube, minding my own business when a coworker walks by.

“Nice tattoo. What is it? A heart?”

It’s actually a heart with an infinity symbol, meaning eternal love.

And it’s my only tattoo I dislike on account of it reminding me of the man I was with when I got it and was all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed about being in love.

Ah, eternal love.

Not!

As it turns out, eternal love only lasts until another woman comes along.

Needless to say, I won’t be wearing sleeveless tops to work anymore.

See. . . I’m learning to be subtle.

 

My other tattoos are:

Save

Burning Man: Getting There, part 1

One of the best parts of Burning Man is getting to go to Reno.

Reno is where my sister lives.

fullsizerender2After getting a SUPER LATE start to Reno*, Tejas and I managed to arrive 5 minutes early for our 6:15 dinner reservations at the Atlantis Steakhouse.

My sister sure knows how to pick a restaurant!

I have two words for you:

LOBSTER BISQUE

Heavenly!

We finished our dinner (and drinks!) and retreated to my sisters house for a little pre-burn party, which sadly did not include her hot tub, but did inclde a taxi ride to Walmart to pick up a handle of vodka and some lemonade.

I’m afraid I got a little loopy but managed to grab an uber with Tejas and return to our hotel.

Big day tomorrow!

 

* SOMEONE woke up late and STILL wasn’t finished packing. . . (HINT:  It wasn’t me)

The dangers of WEARING wasabi

ImageThe sign at the all-you-can-eat sushi bar said that if you order more food than you can eat, you will be charged the a-la-carte price for your sushi.

This weighed heavily on our minds as my sister and I surveyed our table filled with sushi. We were stuffed to the gills and were trying to figure out how to make 20 extra pieces of sushi disappear.

Oh my god, could we do it?!

Being the honest sibling, I just started eating sushi… doing my best to just chew and swallow and not think about how full I already was.

But Lisa, being a little more clever and deceptive, opted to take a different approach.

SHE SHOVED THE SUSHI INTO HER CLEAVAGE!

The waitress came by to check on our progress.  I noticed sushi peeking out of my sister’s cleavage. As the waitress spoke to us, Lisa’s eyes were getting bigger and bigger.  The waitress left.

“What’s wrong,” I asked.

“Listen, we’ve got to get out of here so I can get rid of this sushi. The wasabi is BURNING MY BOOBS!”