I’m reminded of how much pleasure I get from simple things like a scrap of fabric fashioned into clothing for your nethers.
And speaking of getting pleasure from simple things, it’s been YEARS since I got a tattoo.
It used to be that every time I’d go to Reno, I’d come back with a new tattoo.
HOWEVER, two things have sidelined my tattoo adventure:
I got a polyamory-like tattoo BY ACCIDENT thinking it meant “infinite love” which in a way is true. It’s also ironically appropriate for me at this time in my life when I’m single and dating.
I also got a raging case of cellulitis in my right foot when I got my last tattoo because I was taking nude pictures of myself in my sister’s hot tub and I got my foot wet, wet, wet.n My foot turned into a balloon and swelled up like you wouldn’t BELIEVE!
Seeing as how it’s been a few years, it seems like now is as good a time as any to get back on the tattoo bandwagon.
I’m intrigued by a few designs – phoenix, flowers, dream catchers and mandalas.
So I’m wondering what you think about me getting a new tattoo. Should I do it and if so, what should I get?
Start with a mini bottle of Champagne Pink Pop. Pick it out in a pink bottle thinking it’s pink. Discover it’s not pink and be disappointed. Try champagne and be even more disappointed. Add orange juice to make it drinkable.
Try OREgasmic Ale by Rogue Farms, because it’s supposed to be OREgasmic. Discover OREgasmic beer tastes like dirty feet and pot ash. Definitely not orgasmic. Be disappointed.
Try cheap stacked wine which comes in its own glass. Have low expectations. Have low expectations met. Feel foolish for trying wine which comes with a pull off lid.
Try Blood Orange Mimosa. Suspect it’s a headache in a bottle with a screw top lid, but love it anyway. Make your sister drink most of it after dosing it with vodka.
Graduate to bonafide liquor – making really strong mai tai and screwdriver. Decide to hop in the hot tub naked. Have to hang foot out of hot tub because of new foot tattoo (which effing HURTS). Have sister yell at you when you accidentally dip it in the water. Feel sheepish. Snap selfie anyway.
UPDATE: Get RAGING cellulitis (skin infection) from dipping foot in hot tub. Deal with your sister’s “I-told-you-so’s.” On antibiotics. Feel even more sheepish.
I love chicks with tattoos. My gorgeous friend Danielle has the most beautiful artwork on her body from a vibrant peacock to an inspirational Ganesha.
Up until recently, I had no body art. I watched my sister decorate herself with all sorts of artwork. And then I decided to get a tattoo. I got the symbol for balance on my hip. Then I got the symbol for abundance on the other hip.
Then, in a fit of love for my sister, we got matching YS tattoos. They stand for Yase (my nickname for Lisa when I was little) and Shel (Lisa’s nickname for me when she was little).
And finally, I got a symbol for eternal love tattooed on my shoulder – right before my ex-boyfriend dumped me for another woman who he married a year later. So much for MY eternal love. LOL
Which brings me to my plans for another tattoo. And if any of you have any ideas, suggestions, or opinions, please email them to me at email@example.com.
THIS IS WHAT I WANT:
I want a stylized lotus flower, in color on my back. Basically in the same location. Don’t you just LOVE IT?!
Lately, I’ve had a flight of younger men contacting me, Some as young as 27. I’ve also had a bunch of tattooed and bearded men reach out to me. And boy, I just can’t get enough of them.
35 and bearded? With tattoos? Yes, please!
39 with tattoos and a beard? I’ll take seconds.
The truth is I love a man with tattoos and I love a man with facial hair. Throw them together and as long as he’s not as old as ZZ Top, you’ve got a great combination.
Nothing draws attention to manly biceps like a sleeve tattoo… or any tattoo for that matter. It just gives me an excuse to stare at his bicep. The color and design just pull me in. I love hearing a man has tattoos. I can’t wait to see them with his shirt off.
And men with facial hair are super sexy. I love a good growth of scruff all the way on up to a full beard. They’re just so sexy. They scream “KISS MY LIPS!” and make you want to do it over and over again. I love a good scratch to my face by his beard. It doesn’t bother me one bit. It’s a reminder that we kissed.
So can you imagine when you throw these two together, you get a man with serious orgasmic potential. You’ve got the tattoos to tempt you to see more of him naked and you’ve got the beard adding that extra friction we all love.
My ex boyfriend Jason and I were walking down the sidewalk in front of the Bellagio hotel in Las Vegas. Out of the corner of my eye I spotted this tattoo parlor. In a moment of (nearly) unrestrained romanticism, I turned to Jason and said:
You know, Jason…. I could get your initials tattooed on me – an “I love J.C.” tattoo – and even if we broke up I’d still be okay because I could always tell people J.C. stands for Jesus Christ. And who doesn’t love a girl who loves her some Jesus Christ, I ask you?!
[Note: I googled “Jesus Christ tattoos” hoping to find something I could link to or post here, but discovered most Jesus Christ tattoos are remarkably disturbing.]