The wonderful world of onesies

I’ve been invited to TWO Valentine’s Day Pub Crawls.

The first is on the Friday BEFORE Valentine’s Day.

The second is on Valentine’s Day itself.

For both crawls, I will be wearing a onesie.

You know, one of those full body pajamas you see on babies?

EXACTLY!

Now, you might ask why I chose to wear onesies, and it’s a simple answer:

Because one of the crawls is a ONESIE Pub Crawl.

So I’m wearing a rainbow unicorn onesie because I like rainbows and unicorns.

The other pub crawl is a VALENTINE themed pub crawl.

And since my latex dress outfit fell through, I decided to just pick up a Valentine onesie and wear that.

It’s simple and doesn’t require lots of accessorizing.

Between you and I, I happen to have FIVE onesies – the unicorn, the Valentine, a zebra, the Grinch, and Chewbacca.

It’s impossible to have JUST ONE ONESIE.

Do unicorns neigh?

So.

I bought a pair of fence net stockings to wear with my rainbow striped bodysuit.

Stockings are hit and miss with me so I ordered one pair to see if they fit, figuring I’d order more if it ALL WORKED OUT.

Oh, the trials of being a THICK GIRL.

I carefully slip them on.

THEY FIT!

I then attempt to remove them.

They formed a tight little tourniquet around my ankles.

I try to unroll them.

It’s USELESS.

I just wasted a pair of stockings.

Into the trash they go and I’m back online buying three more pairs for Burning Man.

Whether or not I ACTUALLY WEAR this outfit remains to be seen.

But I did wear it at UnSCruz so chances are good. . .

Then I go online on etsy and I come across these FANTASTIC HIGH WAISTED BOOTY SHORTS in all sorts of lovely patterns courtesy of FabBikini in the UK.

AND OMG, I WAS IN LOVE!

I bought three.

And just because I got the pastel unicorn bikini bottom, I bought pink and purple fishnet tights to match.

Cuz that’s how I roll.

You know what this means?

I HAVE to bring my unicorn horn headband.

Have. To.

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