New fetish

I have a new fetish.

I JUST discovered this.

This is in addition to black vinyl lingerie and neoprene wetsuits.

While browsing Instagram, I discovered that I like to watch other people eating food.

There’s the whole WORLD out there where women (and men, but usually women) loudly eat food in front of a camera.

It’s crazy I know, but I can’t look away.

Who discovered this stuff, is what I want to know.

So there I am, browsing Instagram when ANOTHER video comes on which TOTALLY CAPTIVATES me.

Slime.

That’s right, I like videos of people squishing and folding slime with their hands.

I know it’s odd.

My friend Nathan told me as much.

He asked, “How high are you?” when I sent him links to the videos I was watching.

Not at all, but that’s besides the point.

I was floored that he too, wasn’t enthralled with the videos.

And then it happened.

I came across a mash up video of slimy things and eating food, and my life was complete.

Daddy

So I have this friend.

We’ll call him Hank.

And Hank is a very attractive man in his late 50s.

And we’re Facebook friends.

Yesterday, Hank sends me a video of him with a YOUNG girl, post “date,” with her giggling and jiggling her breasts while he sort of stands there awe struck.

WTF?! was my first reaction.

I shot off a quick response:

I hope you got a permission slip from her mother before you took her out!

Naturally, I want to look out for my friend and make sure he doesn’t get popped for statutory rape.

Honestly, I was a little afraid for him.

Turns out the girl is twenty two, so my fear was unfounded but I was a little stymied by the whole scenario.

When I was 22, I was having sex with 28 year old men.

Not 50-somethings.

Actually, when I was 22, I was a newlywed with a 28 year old husband and a half a million dollar mortgage.

I’ve always been precocious like that.

So forgive me if I seem confused but aren’t there people in her own age group who will sleep with her?

My mind instantly filled in the blank.

That thing we all want to say but aren’t.

The pink elephant in the room no one is talking about:

Daddy issues.

And Hank makes a SUPERLATIVE Daddy.

The Adrenaline Rush

The first thing you need to know about The Great Bull Race is that I didn’t do it alone.  My friend Mark and my cousins Jennifer, Nick, and Travis did it with me.

Thank God, because my hands were shaking like a leaf before and after the run.

Imagine a couple hundred people lining a track about 1/4 mile long in 100+ degree heat and that approximates what the experience was like.

We all waited anxiously for the bulls to run.  And run they did.  They came barreling down the track in 3 waves of about 8 bulls.

We let the first wave of bulls and people run right by us.  We ran with the second wave of bulls, captured on video by Mark:

In al honesty, I have to admit I freaked out a little when I got a bit too close to a big black bull.  My, they are big with HUGE horns!  I spent the next 10 seconds glued to th fence.

My cousin Jennifer ran with me.  And she stayed with me the whole time. Even when I freaked out and she wanted to run.  Never left my side.  I love that girl ❤

The whole experience lasted maybe 30 seconds.  But what a wild, heart-pounding 30 seconds it was.

Would I do it again?  Absolutely.  It was a magnificent experience unlike any other I had, and I enjoyed myself immensely.

Being able to run with bulls was incredible.  And being able to do it with friends and family made it even better.  When I originally signed up, I thought I’d be doing the bull run all by myself.

What a lucky woman I am to have such good friends and family.

And now a photo collage of our day:

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photo 3 photo 4
photo 5 photo 1
photo 2 photo 3
photo 4 photo 5

I opted to skip the Tomato Royale tomato fight.  It was a super hot day and I’ve already thrown rotten tomatoes before in a tomato throwing festival so I asked Mark if we could opt out and he agreed.  Jennifer did it with Travis and Nick. Here’s a glorious shot of her, post tomato fling….

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Where’d the beaver go?

In the 60s, a full bush was part of lore, literature, and media.  Now, you’re lucky to find a Dorito chip or a landing strip where a full bush used to be.  I’ll never forget working in a spa in the mid 2000s.  In the beginning, the Brazilian wax was put on the menu and it was a rare woman who strolled through the doors asking for it.  By the time I left the spa, two years later, the Brazilian wax was a daily routine in the spa.

So why the change?  Why did women starting removing their muff?

One reason could be adherence to new fashion styles.  With lingerie and swimsuit fashion becoming smaller and narrower, we didn’t have much of a choice but to go bare.

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Another possible reason is that women started to emulate the fashion magazine models. Perhaps it’s not the fashion magazines style that we’re trying to keep up with but the porn industry, which shapes the sexual imagination of men.  A bare snatch is a defined standard for erotic availability.  It’s is a fantasy.

My friend Steve says he  likes it “shaved or a landing strip.”  My friend Dave wrote, ““When I go down, I don’t want hair.”  He continues, “It’s a huge turn-on when I find out that she’s bare down there. I know tons of guys who think it’s sexy — it shows me that she’s into my pleasure as much as her own.”  Tony simply likes it “trim.”  And Lance says he likes “a woman who likes (her)self…. the pelt is no big deal.”

My girlfriend Jenny says, “In between is my personal fave…just cleaned up, groomed. Doesn’t need to be a landing strip but doesn’t need to be a “sascrotch” as my husband calls me!” Sascrotch is a good term for it.

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 Do women who go bare feel like they’re giving in to a trend?  Maybe.  But they probably have a lot of fun anyway.

So how about the reverse….. do we anticipate seeing men “taking it all off” and going bare.  I think it’s unlikely.  I don’t see too many men lasting through the pain of a Brazilian wax.  What I do see is men trimming their hair to get that “extra optical inch.”  And it works 🙂

Below is a hilarious video from the UK showing the faces of women as they get waxed. Makes me cringe a little, though….