Relief

My son texted me from Arizona, midway on his trip to Missouri.

He looked ABSOLUTELY MISERABLE and as a mother, I wanted to get on a plane and make it all better for him.

Of course, there was nothing I could do.

Then, a few text messages.

One thing was clear, he was NOT HAPPY.

He was EXHAUSTED and BORED, waiting in the airport for his connecting flight to Missouri.

I began to worry about how he would handle boot camp, something clearly challenging for even the most mature of candidates.

Would he get enough sleep?

Food?

Camaraderie?

Would he physically excel or would it prove to be too challenging?

These are the thoughts that raced through my mind.

And not being able to hear from him?

Well, that made it all WORSE and I’m not going to lie.

I had trouble sleeping.

Then yesterday, a phone call from him.

And one that didn’t start with him saying to me, “GET ME OUT OF HERE!”

So I’ve relaxed, a little.

It’s not exactly what this momma bear needs to be happy again, but it provided a little needed relief.

Heaven help military families.

I’m just realizing now how hard it can be.

Ch.. ch.. ch.. changes

My birthmom is moving away.

To Oregon.

She and my step-father have built a brand new home and will be moving in around June 19th.

I had no idea that this was going to happen so soon!

And let me tell you, I’m a little bit worried about having her so far away from me.

For the last twenty two years, she’s been no more than a 2 hour drive away from me.

Now she’ll be a 2 hour flight away from me.

I’m definitely having feelings about this but what they are, I haven’t a clue.

Sadness.

Anxiety.

How will I see her when she’s 600+ miles away?

Honestly, I never considered how it would feel to lose her.

I’ve been taking her presence for granted.

I haven’t seen her as much as I should have or visited as much as I wanted to.

And she’s always been there for me when I needed her.

Their new home is BEAUTIFUL and it’s selfish of me to want her to stay.

I know I’ll adjust.

I’m just saying, I’ve got FEELINGS about this and they’re not all roses and rainbows.

I feel like I’m being left behind.

And it doesn’t feel good.